Union College
I’m so sick to my stomach. I’m trying to sleep on the bus but the echoes of the voices of these students still bounce in my head. You know, I did this so that I could be a voice for those silenced, to be the tough hide for those that need to burrow in my skin. In my mind I know that I could take the beatings. I never questioned my strength or muscle. I’ll spread the message that God loves all, no matter what. That queer people aren’t sick and sinful. That hatred, discrimination, and the marginalizing and oppressing of this beautiful group of people are the real sins. And then I end up speaking against racism, and ableism, and sexism. But it’s the racism that gets me most of all.
For the past three stops we’ve been in the Mid-west. SBU really left me with a sour taste in my mouth and I haven’t been the same since. A white college student writes to me and tells me that she’s not racist and that it’s not their fault that they have an apathetic minority population. This is after I explained why this comment (previously from someone else’s mouth) was racist. How can I have hope for our queer siblings on this campus if the campus can’t even grasp the concept of discrimination in the first place?
So I carried this into Union College yesterday. We sat in small groups and the facilitator took over 15 minutes of our precious hour with students (that administration had so graciously allotted) going over rules of conversation. I felt the pressure of having to condense a two hour conversation with one person into a half hour conversation with 12 people. As soon as one girl said “lifestyle choice” I thought I was about to lose it. I tried to explain why this wasn’t appropriate, but she had a response for everything I said. My body literally felt like it was disconnecting with my mind. That’s when I knew I had reached my limit. In my head I thought, If it’s so damn appropriate why don’t straight people use it to describe their relationships? Ugh. Somehow I pushed through to the end answering questions with responses that I knew only led to more questions that we didn’t have time to address. Who do we point the finger at? The administration and faculty that don’t talk about these topics in school, that perpetuate stereotypes and offensive language, and that shut the door when opportunities present themselves? In my opinion the fault also lies on these students. They are old enough to read the Scripture themselves, to look up resources, to get various opinions on the matter, to make friends with that queer person on campus, to ask questions…instead they hold to their parents’ and pastors’ out-dated bigoted beliefs without verifying any information on their own. Without getting to know the person. Is it so scary to befriend your enemy? You might learn that the enemy is misinformation.
A choice. Yeah, a choice. I choose to be with the person that I fall madly in love with. The person that locks eyes on me from across the room to give me strength when I’m scared. The person that I will hold at night when their past comes to haunt their dreams. The person that I will bicker with when we’re short on money. The person I will laugh with until late at night because what they say and how they say it tickles me on the inside and I haven’t laughed this hard in all my life it seems. The person that will be there the day we adopt our child and bring them home to be nurtured with all the love of two mothers. The person that will hold my hand and give me strength if someday a doctors’ words don’t seem to make sense. The person that as we grow will smile at me because walking slowly through the supermarket is our favorite thing to do.
Passions? What passions. You don’t marry a person because the only thing you feel is passion (or at least not in the case of the people I know). You marry them because they are your perfect fit. Because when the world confuses or frustrates you that person is the only person that is capable of doing the only thing that will soften your heart and at the same time strengthen your core. You marry them because you see a beautiful future together. Because when heart is against heart you swear they share a beat. Because when you look into their eyes there just isn’t anyone else, period, ever. You marry and when parents pass away and family moves away, you know you will not endure it alone. You know this in every breath of your being, you don’t need a paper from the court.
I see my friends on the Ride and it hurts me the things they have endured. I’d rather take it on myself than see it one more time poured on them. Cait and Jennifer, may God bless your union. Don’t justify your relationship and your love to anyone. You both are beautiful and your smiles are contagious. Mia, my brave and courageous friend. I don’t have words for how you empower the rest of us to walk proudly. My dearest Amanda, I weep my apologies on behalf of the world to you… Big brother Nick, who reminds us of what true friendship and service and love is every day. I could go on, but I’m already crying. How can people see this suffering, know they are a part of it, and continue hurting people?
What kind of society do we live in where we walk past homeless people without looking at them? Without handing them a quarter and a smile? What kind of faith do we have when we look at people that are marginalized and oppressed with indifference and apathy? How presumptuous are we to tell others how they should love and with who? What kind of Christians are we that if Jesus walked through our airport today he would be flagged as a potential terrorist and pulled aside to be interrogated? What have we become? Tearing at each other, beating each other with stones and words, and closing our minds to the experiences of others simply because we don’t understand. Wasn’t this one of the sins of Sodom and Gomorrah? Maybe God should come and wipe us away and start over. I’m sad. I’m disheartened. It is painful to watch my siblings be torn down, ridiculed, called sick, and detestable to God. Who is speaking these words? Because my God, my Christ, instructed me to persevere for justice for the minority, for the marginalized, for those oppressed. Jesus taught me that we lose ourselves in the details of the law and forget that the most important thing is to love God with everything you have, and love your neighbor AS YOURSELF. How did we come so far from God that even our definitions of what love is differs from person to person and from perceived sin to perceived sin? How is it that we preach not to judge and yet we can’t see past the color of someone’s skin, the way they look, or who they claim to love?
When was the last time we admitted fault and took our fair share of responsibility in what is wrong with the world today?
Friday, April 23, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Media Advisory for Bethel College, Indiana
SOULFORCE PRESS RELEASE: April 17, 2010
For Immediate Release
******************************************
(Mishawaka, IN) – Today and Yesterday, the 2010 Soulforce Q Equality Ride visited Bethel College, bringing a message of hope and affirmation for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) people. The thirteenth stop on the traveling forum’s fifteen college tour, Equality Riders were allowed limited and scheduled access to students, faculty, and staff throughout the day yesterday and are on campus today for more informal dialogue at the school coffee shop, Sufficient Grounds.
The Equality Ride is a national bus tour to faith-based colleges that have policies that discriminate against LGBTQ people. The 18 to 29-year-old Equality Riders advocate safe educational settings for all students, including those who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer.
On Friday, April 16th, the Soulforce Q Equality Riders arrived at Bethel College where they were greeted by a group of select student, faculty, and staff “hosts.” Following a brief gathering with those campus members, Riders attended chapel with students and then spent the rest of the day attending and participating in classes, and dialoguing in scheduled small and large group settings.
“I was very glad we were on campus but was disheartened by some of the hurtful things that were said and the unwillingness of faculty and administration to reconsider any of their positions," said Equality Rider and Bethel stop planner Nick Miller. “This is one of the only schools where it seemed like we couldn’t even agree that LGBTQ students deserved a safe space to be free from judgment and the ability to openly discuss their gender and sexuality. It was as though we were being asked to ‘agree to disagree’ on grave issues like LGBTQ youth suicide, spiritual abuse, and the devastating effects of the almost universally condemned ‘reparative therapy’ still widely endorsed by Bethel. Although campus leaders purported to be ready and excited about this conversation, it soon became clear that there was no room for consideration of an affirming view or even finding compromises to make all students feel more welcome, and that LGBTQ students on campus will continue to be asked to suffer in silence.”
Riders returned today to debrief with administration about the day on campus by sharing concerns about the treatment of and policies concerning LGBTQ students on campus and offering important and concrete ways to make the campus safer for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer students, faculty and staff. Riders are also spending several hours at the campus coffee house, Sufficient Grounds, for informal dialogue with members of the campus community.
QUOTE
The Equality Ride bus is on the road through April 24, 2010, bringing dialogue, hope, and change to schools across the country. Future stops include:
April 21 Union College Lincoln, NE
April 23 Malone University Canton, OH
###
Soulforce Q is the young adult division of Soulforce, a social justice organization that works to end political and religious oppression of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people through relentless nonviolent resistance. For more information, go to www.equalityride.com.
For Immediate Release
******************************************
(Mishawaka, IN) – Today and Yesterday, the 2010 Soulforce Q Equality Ride visited Bethel College, bringing a message of hope and affirmation for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) people. The thirteenth stop on the traveling forum’s fifteen college tour, Equality Riders were allowed limited and scheduled access to students, faculty, and staff throughout the day yesterday and are on campus today for more informal dialogue at the school coffee shop, Sufficient Grounds.
The Equality Ride is a national bus tour to faith-based colleges that have policies that discriminate against LGBTQ people. The 18 to 29-year-old Equality Riders advocate safe educational settings for all students, including those who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer.
On Friday, April 16th, the Soulforce Q Equality Riders arrived at Bethel College where they were greeted by a group of select student, faculty, and staff “hosts.” Following a brief gathering with those campus members, Riders attended chapel with students and then spent the rest of the day attending and participating in classes, and dialoguing in scheduled small and large group settings.
“I was very glad we were on campus but was disheartened by some of the hurtful things that were said and the unwillingness of faculty and administration to reconsider any of their positions," said Equality Rider and Bethel stop planner Nick Miller. “This is one of the only schools where it seemed like we couldn’t even agree that LGBTQ students deserved a safe space to be free from judgment and the ability to openly discuss their gender and sexuality. It was as though we were being asked to ‘agree to disagree’ on grave issues like LGBTQ youth suicide, spiritual abuse, and the devastating effects of the almost universally condemned ‘reparative therapy’ still widely endorsed by Bethel. Although campus leaders purported to be ready and excited about this conversation, it soon became clear that there was no room for consideration of an affirming view or even finding compromises to make all students feel more welcome, and that LGBTQ students on campus will continue to be asked to suffer in silence.”
Riders returned today to debrief with administration about the day on campus by sharing concerns about the treatment of and policies concerning LGBTQ students on campus and offering important and concrete ways to make the campus safer for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer students, faculty and staff. Riders are also spending several hours at the campus coffee house, Sufficient Grounds, for informal dialogue with members of the campus community.
QUOTE
The Equality Ride bus is on the road through April 24, 2010, bringing dialogue, hope, and change to schools across the country. Future stops include:
April 21 Union College Lincoln, NE
April 23 Malone University Canton, OH
###
Soulforce Q is the young adult division of Soulforce, a social justice organization that works to end political and religious oppression of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people through relentless nonviolent resistance. For more information, go to www.equalityride.com.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Unpacking the White Knapsack
Webpage: http://www.mdcbowen.org/p2/rm/mcintosh1.html
Most white, middle-class citizens see society from a monocultural perspective, a perspective that assumes, often unconsciously, that persons of all races are in the same cultural system together. This single-system form of seeing the world, is blind to its own cultural specificity. People who see persons of other races monoculturally cannot imagine the reality that those "others" think of themselves not in relation to the majority race but in terms of their own culturally specific identities. This paper presents an "interactive phase theory" with regard to race that is intended to reassess school curricula in terms of heightened levels of consciousness concerning race.
ON THE INVISIBILITY OF PRIVILEGE
from Dr. Peggy McIntosh, Wellesley College Center for Research on Women... "I had been taught about racism as something which puts others at a disadvantage, but had been taught not to see one of its corollary aspects, white privilege... "I have come to see white privilege as an invisible package of unearned assets which I can count on cashing in each day, but about which I was 'meant' to remain oblivious. White privilege is like an invisible weightless knapsack of special provisions, assurances, tools, maps, guides, code books, passports, visas, clothes, compass, emergency gear and blank checks. "Whites are taught to think of their lives as morally neutral, formative and average, and also ideal, so that when we work to benefit others, this is seen as work which will allow 'them' to be more like 'us.'" Dr. McIntosh has named some of the ways of white privilege:
1. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my race most of the time.
2. I can avoid spending time with people whom I was trained to mistrust and who have learned to mistrust my kind or me.
3. If I should need to move, I can be pretty sure of renting or purchasing housing in an area which I can afford and in which I would want to live.
4. I can be pretty sure that my neighbors in such a location will be neutral or pleasant to me.
5. I can go shopping alone most of the time, pretty well assured that I will not be followed or harassed.
6. I can turn on the television or open to the front page of the paper and see people of my race widely represented.
7. When I am told about our national heritage or about "civilization," I am shown that people of my color made it what it is.
8. I can be sure that my children will be given curricular materials that testify to the existence of their race.
9. If I want to, I can be pretty sure of finding a publisher for this piece on white privilege.
10. I can be pretty sure of having my voice heard in a group in which I am the only member of my race.
11. I can be casual about whether or not to listen to another person's voice in a group in which s/he is the only member of his/her race.
12. I can go into a music shop and count on finding the music of my race represented, into a supermarket and find the staple foods which fit with my cultural traditions, into a hairdresser's shop and find someone who can cut my hair.
13. Whether I use checks, credit cards or cash, I can count on my skin color not to work against the appearance of financial reliability.
14. I can arrange to protect my children most of the time from people who might not like them.
15. I do not have to educate my children to be aware of systemic racism for their own daily physical protection.
16. I can be pretty sure that my children's teachers and employers will tolerate them if they fit school and workplace norms; my chief worries about them do not concern others' attitudes toward their race.
17. I can talk with my mouth full and not have people put this down to my color.
18. I can swear, or dress in second hand clothes, or not answer letters, without having people attribute these choices to the bad morals, the poverty or the illiteracy of my race.
19. I can speak in public to a powerful male group without putting my race on trial.
20. I can do well in a challenging situation without being called a credit to my race.
21. I am never asked to speak for all the people of my racial group.
22. I can remain oblivious of the language and customs of persons of color who constitute the world's majority without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
23. I can criticize our government and talk about how much I fear its policies and behavior without being seen as a cultural outsider.
24. I can be pretty sure that if I ask to talk to the "person in charge", I will be facing a person of my race.
25. If a traffic cop pulls me over or if the IRS audits my tax return, I can be sure I haven't been singled out because of my race.
26. I can easily buy posters, post-cards, picture books, greeting cards, dolls, toys and children's magazines featuring people of my race.
27. I can go home from most meetings of organizations I belong to feeling somewhat tied in, rather than isolated, out-of-place, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance or feared.
28. I can be pretty sure that an argument with a colleague of another race is more likely to jeopardize her/his chances for advancement than to jeopardize mine.
29. I can be pretty sure that if I argue for the promotion of a person of another race, or a program centering on race, this is not likely to cost me heavily within my prsent setting, eben if my colleagues disagree with me.
30. If I declare there is a racial issue at hand, or there isn't a racial issue at hand, my race will lend me more credibility for either position than a person of color will have.
31. I can choose to ignore developments in minority writing and minority activist programs, or disparage them, or learn from them, but in any case, I can find ways to be more or less protected from negative consequences of any of these choices.
32. My culture gives me little fear about ignoring the perspectives and powers of people of other races.
33. I am not made acutely aware that my shape, bearing or body odor will be taken as a reflection on my race.
34. I can worry about racism without being seen as self-interested or self-seeking.
35. I can take a job with an affirmative action employer without having my co-workers on the job suspect that I got it because of my race.
36. If my day, week or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether it had racial overtones.
37. I can be pretty sure of finding people who would be willing to talk with me and advise me about my next steps, professionally.
38. I can think over many options, social, political, imaginative or professional, without asking whether a person of my race would be accepted or allowed to do what I want to do.
39. I can be late to a meeting without having the lateness reflect on my race.
40. I can choose public accommodation without fearing that people of my race cannot get in or will be mistreated in the places I have chosen.
41. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help, my race will not work against me.
42. I can arrange my activities so that I will never have to experience feelings of rejection owing to my race.
43. If I have low credibility as a leader I can be sure that my race is not the problem.
44. I can easily find academic courses and institutions which give attention only to people of my race.
45. I can expect figurative language and imagery in all of the arts to testify to experiences of my race.
46. I can choose blemish cover or bandages in "flesh" color and have them more or less match my skin.
47. I can travel alone or with my spouse without expecting embarrassment or hostility in those who deal with us.
48. I have no difficulty finding neighborhoods where people approve of our household.
49. My children are given texts and classes which implicitly support our kind of family unit and do not turn them against my choice of domestic partnership.
50. I will feel welcomed and "normal" in the usual walks of public life, institutional and social.
"Having described this, what will we each do to lessen this imbalance of power and privilege? Will we choose to use our arbitrarily-awarded power to try to re-construct power systems?'
Most white, middle-class citizens see society from a monocultural perspective, a perspective that assumes, often unconsciously, that persons of all races are in the same cultural system together. This single-system form of seeing the world, is blind to its own cultural specificity. People who see persons of other races monoculturally cannot imagine the reality that those "others" think of themselves not in relation to the majority race but in terms of their own culturally specific identities. This paper presents an "interactive phase theory" with regard to race that is intended to reassess school curricula in terms of heightened levels of consciousness concerning race.
ON THE INVISIBILITY OF PRIVILEGE
from Dr. Peggy McIntosh, Wellesley College Center for Research on Women... "I had been taught about racism as something which puts others at a disadvantage, but had been taught not to see one of its corollary aspects, white privilege... "I have come to see white privilege as an invisible package of unearned assets which I can count on cashing in each day, but about which I was 'meant' to remain oblivious. White privilege is like an invisible weightless knapsack of special provisions, assurances, tools, maps, guides, code books, passports, visas, clothes, compass, emergency gear and blank checks. "Whites are taught to think of their lives as morally neutral, formative and average, and also ideal, so that when we work to benefit others, this is seen as work which will allow 'them' to be more like 'us.'" Dr. McIntosh has named some of the ways of white privilege:
1. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my race most of the time.
2. I can avoid spending time with people whom I was trained to mistrust and who have learned to mistrust my kind or me.
3. If I should need to move, I can be pretty sure of renting or purchasing housing in an area which I can afford and in which I would want to live.
4. I can be pretty sure that my neighbors in such a location will be neutral or pleasant to me.
5. I can go shopping alone most of the time, pretty well assured that I will not be followed or harassed.
6. I can turn on the television or open to the front page of the paper and see people of my race widely represented.
7. When I am told about our national heritage or about "civilization," I am shown that people of my color made it what it is.
8. I can be sure that my children will be given curricular materials that testify to the existence of their race.
9. If I want to, I can be pretty sure of finding a publisher for this piece on white privilege.
10. I can be pretty sure of having my voice heard in a group in which I am the only member of my race.
11. I can be casual about whether or not to listen to another person's voice in a group in which s/he is the only member of his/her race.
12. I can go into a music shop and count on finding the music of my race represented, into a supermarket and find the staple foods which fit with my cultural traditions, into a hairdresser's shop and find someone who can cut my hair.
13. Whether I use checks, credit cards or cash, I can count on my skin color not to work against the appearance of financial reliability.
14. I can arrange to protect my children most of the time from people who might not like them.
15. I do not have to educate my children to be aware of systemic racism for their own daily physical protection.
16. I can be pretty sure that my children's teachers and employers will tolerate them if they fit school and workplace norms; my chief worries about them do not concern others' attitudes toward their race.
17. I can talk with my mouth full and not have people put this down to my color.
18. I can swear, or dress in second hand clothes, or not answer letters, without having people attribute these choices to the bad morals, the poverty or the illiteracy of my race.
19. I can speak in public to a powerful male group without putting my race on trial.
20. I can do well in a challenging situation without being called a credit to my race.
21. I am never asked to speak for all the people of my racial group.
22. I can remain oblivious of the language and customs of persons of color who constitute the world's majority without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
23. I can criticize our government and talk about how much I fear its policies and behavior without being seen as a cultural outsider.
24. I can be pretty sure that if I ask to talk to the "person in charge", I will be facing a person of my race.
25. If a traffic cop pulls me over or if the IRS audits my tax return, I can be sure I haven't been singled out because of my race.
26. I can easily buy posters, post-cards, picture books, greeting cards, dolls, toys and children's magazines featuring people of my race.
27. I can go home from most meetings of organizations I belong to feeling somewhat tied in, rather than isolated, out-of-place, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance or feared.
28. I can be pretty sure that an argument with a colleague of another race is more likely to jeopardize her/his chances for advancement than to jeopardize mine.
29. I can be pretty sure that if I argue for the promotion of a person of another race, or a program centering on race, this is not likely to cost me heavily within my prsent setting, eben if my colleagues disagree with me.
30. If I declare there is a racial issue at hand, or there isn't a racial issue at hand, my race will lend me more credibility for either position than a person of color will have.
31. I can choose to ignore developments in minority writing and minority activist programs, or disparage them, or learn from them, but in any case, I can find ways to be more or less protected from negative consequences of any of these choices.
32. My culture gives me little fear about ignoring the perspectives and powers of people of other races.
33. I am not made acutely aware that my shape, bearing or body odor will be taken as a reflection on my race.
34. I can worry about racism without being seen as self-interested or self-seeking.
35. I can take a job with an affirmative action employer without having my co-workers on the job suspect that I got it because of my race.
36. If my day, week or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether it had racial overtones.
37. I can be pretty sure of finding people who would be willing to talk with me and advise me about my next steps, professionally.
38. I can think over many options, social, political, imaginative or professional, without asking whether a person of my race would be accepted or allowed to do what I want to do.
39. I can be late to a meeting without having the lateness reflect on my race.
40. I can choose public accommodation without fearing that people of my race cannot get in or will be mistreated in the places I have chosen.
41. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help, my race will not work against me.
42. I can arrange my activities so that I will never have to experience feelings of rejection owing to my race.
43. If I have low credibility as a leader I can be sure that my race is not the problem.
44. I can easily find academic courses and institutions which give attention only to people of my race.
45. I can expect figurative language and imagery in all of the arts to testify to experiences of my race.
46. I can choose blemish cover or bandages in "flesh" color and have them more or less match my skin.
47. I can travel alone or with my spouse without expecting embarrassment or hostility in those who deal with us.
48. I have no difficulty finding neighborhoods where people approve of our household.
49. My children are given texts and classes which implicitly support our kind of family unit and do not turn them against my choice of domestic partnership.
50. I will feel welcomed and "normal" in the usual walks of public life, institutional and social.
"Having described this, what will we each do to lessen this imbalance of power and privilege? Will we choose to use our arbitrarily-awarded power to try to re-construct power systems?'
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Southwest Baptist University
It might be safe to say that the Riders as a whole, walked away from Southwest Baptist University disturbed and sick to our stomachs. I first have to apologize for anything offensive I may say, but after 13 schools where I have endured racism, sexism, homophobia, masogynism, classism, ageism, and different oppressions I am tired of having patience. SBU, while not the worst school in terms of welcome and friendliness, for me were absolutely clueless in regards to systems of oppression, racism, sexism...I can go on.
Where do I begin?
We arrived at the school about 10 minutes early and as we were getting off the bus students, faculty, staff, and administrators began pouring out of the front doors to greet us. It immediately put a smile on my face. BSU was Amanda's stop and in my heart I wanted everything to go so well, knowing she had worked very hard along with the school to schedule the day. As I shook hands and introduced myself to a group of smiling faces, my host for the day, Revecca, found me and Jennifer Luu. Not all schools feel the need to pair the Riders up with student or faculty "hosts", but there have been a few schools that do that. I don't mind. Sometimes it really works out, like it did for me yesterday. I thought Revecca, a staff member in the Physical Therapy department, was smart and friendly a wonderful listener and I greatly enjoyed her company. It always takes me a moment to try to gauge who I'm paired with because schools have done some devious things, like tell their hosts not to bother to engage in debate with us because we are so well "trained" that it would be futile. Yeah, just some really dumb things that hurt any type of relationship even before it begins. Jennifer and I chatted with Revecca for a while, explained Preferred Pronoun Preferences, talked about past campus visits, and discussed the intersections of oppression...all before lunch!
We talked a little bit with faculty and administrators and had coffee and then we all walked to chapel. I really believe that's where all problems began. The service was atrocious. Apparently there was a guest speaker and none of the administrators wanted to take responsibility for the awful things this person said, instead passing the buck or shirking responsibility. I'll paint a picture. As soon as I walked into this huge auditorium there was metal christian rock playing. I was happily surprised. It was lively and fun. We settled down. I sat near Amanda and other fellow Riders and took a moment away from my amazing host to enjoy service. Then a band came on and started singing and playing music. While it was nice I was painfully aware of the lack of representation of people of color. Nothing ethnic whatsoever except for a very offensive shout out of something like "let's begin the Natives are getting restless". It only got worse. A picture of Black babies came on the huge flatscreens and a speaker came out to give a sermon (lecture?). He talked about how he had just come from (Sudan?) and saw how little girls as young as age 8 were exploited, and went into great detail about how often they were used in an hour and daily...and then in the next sentence called that same exploited child a "whore". I almost vomited. Then the very next moment he was saying that people do worse things than that in their heads. What? I was so offended and disgusted and still couldn't understand why there were pictures of Black children on the screen and a White speaker that obviously had no idea what he was talking about (and from comments from the students later that day, they had no idea what he was talking about either). Another huge problem we saw was the "sermon's" emphasis on missionary work. The speaker (sorry I can't remember the name) said that the decision wasn't about whether to go, but whether you should stay. And as I spoke to more people and realized their absolute lack of understanding of other races/ethnicities and cultures...and given missionary works' legacy of cultural genocide and destruction of whole peoples...throwing these kids into this type of work without any type of sensitivity training (what's that?) was disturbing to us. I wanted to get out of there. And I like missionary work! I think it's a great idea to get involved in your world. But not the way SBU is doing it. Not with kids that at 19 and 20 years old are asking questions like, "well, isn't White a color too?" After the awful speech/sermon there was more music full of sexist and ableist offensive language. There was a "boys'" part followed by a "girl's" part and the lyrics were all about "standing for God". Clearly, they don't think about their students who may have trouble with this wording. As one of our Riders uses a wheelchair, they have helped us become more aware of the language we use. I try to tell myself that the school allowing us on campus was a big step in the right direction, but I'm not sure. They are absolutely clueless about how to overcome any type of oppression in their own school although they have been in business for 132 years.
Between chapel and lunch we stopped at the "quad" by the fountain and talked with students. I was approached by a really wonderful young man and his friend and although I am going to respect our conversation, I at least want to commend this person for opening their heart and trusting me with some very confidential information about his past and opening himself up through dialogue to reveal his pain about the racism that permeates SBU. Frankly, I was pissed off when he said that people "look away" when he passes by and then he shared his pessimism that the school could ever change. It saddened my heart and told him that we were here to talk about all forms of oppression and discrimination and that even though he couldn't make it to the panel (the only event opened to all students) I would make sure to speak up for him.
We moved on to lunch after that. Round tables with 6 or 7 people and some really great food. I was hoping to begin engaging in some real dialogue about LGBTQ issues at my table, but I just so happened to sit with Kurt, the Chapel Director, and DJ (bless her heart) blurted out "Who let that guy speak?" And so ensued a conversation about racism and missionary work in which the Dean of Students, the Chapel Director, a Student Representative, Revecca, and four Riders all had much to say. I didn't hold back. I was hurt from the awful chapel service where I was offended from the pulpit as a woman and as a person who admires missionary work, as a person of color that was not represented, and as a person that work against this narrow-minded view of the world. Kurt's response was "we have minorities preach, don't judge on what you see in only one day"...and I lost it. I said, "there is NO excuse or reason why people of color should not be in everything you do ALL the time. It is not about us being included by White people, but about being an integral part of everything that is happening in this world." (None of that verbatim, I was pissed off and I was so appalled at what this supposed Leader was saying, how clueless he was, how blatant the racism...there was no way I could stay quiet. Another racist and stupid remark: "We want people of color to participate but they just aren't interested." WTF? If I walk into chapel and it is heavy metal or ska punk, and the band and singers are White, what they sing and how they sing it does not represent my culture or how I grew up whatsoever, and people from the pulpit are saying some ignorant, racist remarks while displaying Black kids' faces for sympathy... WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THAT? Most of the diversity population (6%) are there for athletics. So what I gathered is that they take in "minority" kids on athletic scholarships to claim diversity, preying on the fact that most of these kids need it so that they can get a degree, taylor events and activities specifically around White culture or standards, and then BLAME these students because they are not interested in going through more ostracism and mental harm. One of the seniors at our table asked so many good questions, making himself vulnerable, but at the same time...HE'S A SENIOR! Like, about to graduate, and go off into the world and asked questions like: "Isn't White a color?" Had no idea what "White Privilege" was, nor the hint of understanding systems of oppression. This while the Dean of Students and the Chapel Director also could not explain, and were using offensive language as well!
It was a really long day. After that six of our Riders joined a panel discussion with 6 SBU students and faculty. It was awful, too. While Jess, one of our Riders who is a queer woman of color, spoke during the panel another Rider, Jason, sat in front of a Psychology Professor and heard all kinds of derogatory comments about her. And one of the panelists, a professor actually said something like: "The way I love you I call it love and you call it oppression, it's sad." Four of us from the audience yelled back, “YES, it IS sad!” So, kick us out of your schools, out of your communities, out of your families...because that's what you think love is, nevermind how it was that Jesus would love people.
At the end of the day some of us were ashamed of calling ourselves Christians. Personally, as someone that has just found Jesus three years ago and am still growing in my faith I lost my excitement for the first time. I question what Christians believe love is and if that aligns with my vision of love. And how can it be possible that I am capable of loving my friends greater than what God is capable of? How is it that I can love them and find them beautiful and God cannot? I remind myself that God sent Jesus as the ultimate example, and to not look to the different kinds of Christianity or Christians to follow. I try to remind myself. Sometimes the fences and divisions that we encounter along the way make it really difficult for me to believe that God wanted that. Pentecostal, Protestant, Mormon, Quakers, Baptist, whatever. They claim to be more right than others. And then Christianity claims to be more right than Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, etc. I throw my hands in the air and just pray. Pray that God knows we are simple and just need to be loved. And that being loved is not as complicated as we want to make it.
Where do I begin?
We arrived at the school about 10 minutes early and as we were getting off the bus students, faculty, staff, and administrators began pouring out of the front doors to greet us. It immediately put a smile on my face. BSU was Amanda's stop and in my heart I wanted everything to go so well, knowing she had worked very hard along with the school to schedule the day. As I shook hands and introduced myself to a group of smiling faces, my host for the day, Revecca, found me and Jennifer Luu. Not all schools feel the need to pair the Riders up with student or faculty "hosts", but there have been a few schools that do that. I don't mind. Sometimes it really works out, like it did for me yesterday. I thought Revecca, a staff member in the Physical Therapy department, was smart and friendly a wonderful listener and I greatly enjoyed her company. It always takes me a moment to try to gauge who I'm paired with because schools have done some devious things, like tell their hosts not to bother to engage in debate with us because we are so well "trained" that it would be futile. Yeah, just some really dumb things that hurt any type of relationship even before it begins. Jennifer and I chatted with Revecca for a while, explained Preferred Pronoun Preferences, talked about past campus visits, and discussed the intersections of oppression...all before lunch!
We talked a little bit with faculty and administrators and had coffee and then we all walked to chapel. I really believe that's where all problems began. The service was atrocious. Apparently there was a guest speaker and none of the administrators wanted to take responsibility for the awful things this person said, instead passing the buck or shirking responsibility. I'll paint a picture. As soon as I walked into this huge auditorium there was metal christian rock playing. I was happily surprised. It was lively and fun. We settled down. I sat near Amanda and other fellow Riders and took a moment away from my amazing host to enjoy service. Then a band came on and started singing and playing music. While it was nice I was painfully aware of the lack of representation of people of color. Nothing ethnic whatsoever except for a very offensive shout out of something like "let's begin the Natives are getting restless". It only got worse. A picture of Black babies came on the huge flatscreens and a speaker came out to give a sermon (lecture?). He talked about how he had just come from (Sudan?) and saw how little girls as young as age 8 were exploited, and went into great detail about how often they were used in an hour and daily...and then in the next sentence called that same exploited child a "whore". I almost vomited. Then the very next moment he was saying that people do worse things than that in their heads. What? I was so offended and disgusted and still couldn't understand why there were pictures of Black children on the screen and a White speaker that obviously had no idea what he was talking about (and from comments from the students later that day, they had no idea what he was talking about either). Another huge problem we saw was the "sermon's" emphasis on missionary work. The speaker (sorry I can't remember the name) said that the decision wasn't about whether to go, but whether you should stay. And as I spoke to more people and realized their absolute lack of understanding of other races/ethnicities and cultures...and given missionary works' legacy of cultural genocide and destruction of whole peoples...throwing these kids into this type of work without any type of sensitivity training (what's that?) was disturbing to us. I wanted to get out of there. And I like missionary work! I think it's a great idea to get involved in your world. But not the way SBU is doing it. Not with kids that at 19 and 20 years old are asking questions like, "well, isn't White a color too?" After the awful speech/sermon there was more music full of sexist and ableist offensive language. There was a "boys'" part followed by a "girl's" part and the lyrics were all about "standing for God". Clearly, they don't think about their students who may have trouble with this wording. As one of our Riders uses a wheelchair, they have helped us become more aware of the language we use. I try to tell myself that the school allowing us on campus was a big step in the right direction, but I'm not sure. They are absolutely clueless about how to overcome any type of oppression in their own school although they have been in business for 132 years.
Between chapel and lunch we stopped at the "quad" by the fountain and talked with students. I was approached by a really wonderful young man and his friend and although I am going to respect our conversation, I at least want to commend this person for opening their heart and trusting me with some very confidential information about his past and opening himself up through dialogue to reveal his pain about the racism that permeates SBU. Frankly, I was pissed off when he said that people "look away" when he passes by and then he shared his pessimism that the school could ever change. It saddened my heart and told him that we were here to talk about all forms of oppression and discrimination and that even though he couldn't make it to the panel (the only event opened to all students) I would make sure to speak up for him.
We moved on to lunch after that. Round tables with 6 or 7 people and some really great food. I was hoping to begin engaging in some real dialogue about LGBTQ issues at my table, but I just so happened to sit with Kurt, the Chapel Director, and DJ (bless her heart) blurted out "Who let that guy speak?" And so ensued a conversation about racism and missionary work in which the Dean of Students, the Chapel Director, a Student Representative, Revecca, and four Riders all had much to say. I didn't hold back. I was hurt from the awful chapel service where I was offended from the pulpit as a woman and as a person who admires missionary work, as a person of color that was not represented, and as a person that work against this narrow-minded view of the world. Kurt's response was "we have minorities preach, don't judge on what you see in only one day"...and I lost it. I said, "there is NO excuse or reason why people of color should not be in everything you do ALL the time. It is not about us being included by White people, but about being an integral part of everything that is happening in this world." (None of that verbatim, I was pissed off and I was so appalled at what this supposed Leader was saying, how clueless he was, how blatant the racism...there was no way I could stay quiet. Another racist and stupid remark: "We want people of color to participate but they just aren't interested." WTF? If I walk into chapel and it is heavy metal or ska punk, and the band and singers are White, what they sing and how they sing it does not represent my culture or how I grew up whatsoever, and people from the pulpit are saying some ignorant, racist remarks while displaying Black kids' faces for sympathy... WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THAT? Most of the diversity population (6%) are there for athletics. So what I gathered is that they take in "minority" kids on athletic scholarships to claim diversity, preying on the fact that most of these kids need it so that they can get a degree, taylor events and activities specifically around White culture or standards, and then BLAME these students because they are not interested in going through more ostracism and mental harm. One of the seniors at our table asked so many good questions, making himself vulnerable, but at the same time...HE'S A SENIOR! Like, about to graduate, and go off into the world and asked questions like: "Isn't White a color?" Had no idea what "White Privilege" was, nor the hint of understanding systems of oppression. This while the Dean of Students and the Chapel Director also could not explain, and were using offensive language as well!
It was a really long day. After that six of our Riders joined a panel discussion with 6 SBU students and faculty. It was awful, too. While Jess, one of our Riders who is a queer woman of color, spoke during the panel another Rider, Jason, sat in front of a Psychology Professor and heard all kinds of derogatory comments about her. And one of the panelists, a professor actually said something like: "The way I love you I call it love and you call it oppression, it's sad." Four of us from the audience yelled back, “YES, it IS sad!” So, kick us out of your schools, out of your communities, out of your families...because that's what you think love is, nevermind how it was that Jesus would love people.
At the end of the day some of us were ashamed of calling ourselves Christians. Personally, as someone that has just found Jesus three years ago and am still growing in my faith I lost my excitement for the first time. I question what Christians believe love is and if that aligns with my vision of love. And how can it be possible that I am capable of loving my friends greater than what God is capable of? How is it that I can love them and find them beautiful and God cannot? I remind myself that God sent Jesus as the ultimate example, and to not look to the different kinds of Christianity or Christians to follow. I try to remind myself. Sometimes the fences and divisions that we encounter along the way make it really difficult for me to believe that God wanted that. Pentecostal, Protestant, Mormon, Quakers, Baptist, whatever. They claim to be more right than others. And then Christianity claims to be more right than Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, etc. I throw my hands in the air and just pray. Pray that God knows we are simple and just need to be loved. And that being loved is not as complicated as we want to make it.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Letter from Shaunita @ Bethune Cookman University in Daytona, FL
Hi! I read about the Baylor experience on your blog-OMG! I am glad that it ended better than it started, referring to the evening event that you all
had together. I am really sorry about that. It makes me go :WTH?! What
more does it take? How much struggle and pain has to continue before we have real rights in this world for everyone?
About the person you mentioned in your blog who wanted to know the
difference between a sexual act and a same sex friendship- I may have that
same question in a sense. I asked some of my friends onTrevorSpace-what
makes a person gay? Several of them told me that you have to have sex with
someone of the same sex/be sexual with them or have some sort of sexual
attraction to call yourself a member of the gay community. I was a little
shocked that they would say this. And I disagree. I havent been with a
woman before but all my life I have questioned what I am. I have been and
am attracted to women and men. I have only been with men but I have not
considered myself fully straight. I always look at those questionaire
boxes with unease. I was never sure whether to put a title or anything on
myself because of the stigmas from family, friends and society,etc. I
subconsciously and secretly considered myself bisexual. I was confused
about my sexual orientation for a long time because I wasnot sure if I had
to DO something first. But I always thought about it. I always wondered. I
have always questioned myself and my sexuality. I understand of course
that it doesnt take sex for a person to know they are LGBTQ.
When you guys came to campus I was so excited! I felt free being with you
guys. I felt free from the traps of what people say or think or how people
put you in labels;even how we put labels on ourselves. I feel wonderful
inside. I want to express it more. Talking with you, I didnt (and dont)
feel like a sexual/racial anomaly. I walked away from our conversation
feeling like a better person and saying to myself-I AM gay;I AM bisexual.
And I felt great with that. I feel better about myself. I feel more
comfortable with who I am because I remembered that there are others out
here -there is you and everybody with Soulforce.
Going to BCU there is no outlet to express who you are.You get away from
that whole experience of what I described above. Being in Daytona I dont
see alot of avenues to do this. Back home (Seattle) as I mentioned before
there are so many organizations, clubs and groups-I felt relieved when I
talked to you because it was almost like that part of me had been on ice
or reserve or shut away/subconsciously forgotten in order to cope.
I am unsure whether you all made an impact here at BCU. I seem to be the
only person talking about you guys being here. Not many people knew you
all were here and not many seemed to care enough to stop by the table or
to see what you all were saying. I am embarassed by my campus:( A lot of
people donot seem to care about anything but themselves on this
campus-they just want to make it out of this school or hang out. I dont
know many activist like spirits here and it saddens me.
> > Shaunita De'Juanette Felder
> >
> >
> >
> > "I wish to live because life has within it that which is good, that which
> > is beautiful and that which is love.
> > Therefore, since I have known all of these things, I have found them to be
> > reason enough and-I wish to live.
> > Moreover, because this is so, I wish others to live for generations and
> > generations and generations."
> > -Lorraine Hansberry
> >
> >
> > "Freedom cannot be given; freedom is something that comes into being when
> > you do not seek it; it comes into being only when you know you are a
> > prisoner, when you know for yourself completely the state of being
> > conditioned, when you know you are held by society, by culture, by
> > tradition, held by whatever you have been told. Freedom is order - it is
> > never disorder - and one must have freedom, completely, both outwardly and
> > inwardly; without freedom there is no clarity; without freedom you can't
> > love; without freedom you can't find truth; without freedom you can't go
> > beyond the limitation of the mind. You must demand it with all your being.
> > When you so demand it, you will find out for yourself what order is - and
> > order is not the following of a pattern, a design; it is not the outcome
> > of habit".
> >
> > - J. Krishnamurti, Bombay, India, January 1968 Collected Works. Vol. VIII
***Permission was attained to use her full name and school.
had together. I am really sorry about that. It makes me go :WTH?! What
more does it take? How much struggle and pain has to continue before we have real rights in this world for everyone?
About the person you mentioned in your blog who wanted to know the
difference between a sexual act and a same sex friendship- I may have that
same question in a sense. I asked some of my friends onTrevorSpace-what
makes a person gay? Several of them told me that you have to have sex with
someone of the same sex/be sexual with them or have some sort of sexual
attraction to call yourself a member of the gay community. I was a little
shocked that they would say this. And I disagree. I havent been with a
woman before but all my life I have questioned what I am. I have been and
am attracted to women and men. I have only been with men but I have not
considered myself fully straight. I always look at those questionaire
boxes with unease. I was never sure whether to put a title or anything on
myself because of the stigmas from family, friends and society,etc. I
subconsciously and secretly considered myself bisexual. I was confused
about my sexual orientation for a long time because I wasnot sure if I had
to DO something first. But I always thought about it. I always wondered. I
have always questioned myself and my sexuality. I understand of course
that it doesnt take sex for a person to know they are LGBTQ.
When you guys came to campus I was so excited! I felt free being with you
guys. I felt free from the traps of what people say or think or how people
put you in labels;even how we put labels on ourselves. I feel wonderful
inside. I want to express it more. Talking with you, I didnt (and dont)
feel like a sexual/racial anomaly. I walked away from our conversation
feeling like a better person and saying to myself-I AM gay;I AM bisexual.
And I felt great with that. I feel better about myself. I feel more
comfortable with who I am because I remembered that there are others out
here -there is you and everybody with Soulforce.
Going to BCU there is no outlet to express who you are.You get away from
that whole experience of what I described above. Being in Daytona I dont
see alot of avenues to do this. Back home (Seattle) as I mentioned before
there are so many organizations, clubs and groups-I felt relieved when I
talked to you because it was almost like that part of me had been on ice
or reserve or shut away/subconsciously forgotten in order to cope.
I am unsure whether you all made an impact here at BCU. I seem to be the
only person talking about you guys being here. Not many people knew you
all were here and not many seemed to care enough to stop by the table or
to see what you all were saying. I am embarassed by my campus:( A lot of
people donot seem to care about anything but themselves on this
campus-they just want to make it out of this school or hang out. I dont
know many activist like spirits here and it saddens me.
> > Shaunita De'Juanette Felder
> >
> >
> >
> > "I wish to live because life has within it that which is good, that which
> > is beautiful and that which is love.
> > Therefore, since I have known all of these things, I have found them to be
> > reason enough and-I wish to live.
> > Moreover, because this is so, I wish others to live for generations and
> > generations and generations."
> > -Lorraine Hansberry
> >
> >
> > "Freedom cannot be given; freedom is something that comes into being when
> > you do not seek it; it comes into being only when you know you are a
> > prisoner, when you know for yourself completely the state of being
> > conditioned, when you know you are held by society, by culture, by
> > tradition, held by whatever you have been told. Freedom is order - it is
> > never disorder - and one must have freedom, completely, both outwardly and
> > inwardly; without freedom there is no clarity; without freedom you can't
> > love; without freedom you can't find truth; without freedom you can't go
> > beyond the limitation of the mind. You must demand it with all your being.
> > When you so demand it, you will find out for yourself what order is - and
> > order is not the following of a pattern, a design; it is not the outcome
> > of habit".
> >
> > - J. Krishnamurti, Bombay, India, January 1968 Collected Works. Vol. VIII
***Permission was attained to use her full name and school.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Baylor University in Waco, Texas
Today we visited the much anticipated Baylor University. Two years ago when Soulforce visited the campus they chalked in front of the chapel and were asked to stop. All but five Riders and one student stopped at which point the ones that continued were arrested on trespassing charges. Yes, I said “chalked” which is the same as writing on sidewalk and streets with chalk. When they were taken to jail they were cavity searched, kept overnight before pretrial even though they were arrested mid-day, and a Trans Rider was mistreated he was placed in a female cell. All this, may I repeat, for chalking on sidewalk.
Mia and Jaxon, the Stop Planners for the school, coordinated a different approach this year and negotiated with administrator’s permission on campus to speak to students, faculty, and staff. So at 9am we walked onto campus excited to engage in dialogue and common ground. Nick and I volunteered to join in on a Philosophy class led by Dr. Dougherty who was the only Professor on campus to facilitate any kind of discussion or incorporate our visit into a class. This, I am sure, had a lot to do with the fact that Baylor did not send any type of e-mail announcing our visit and kept it very silent up until a day or two ago that they sent an e-mail that could be considered condescending (at best) by many. Kudos to Prof. Dougherty who I feel had the best intentions. It was disappointing that the dialogue that this opportunity fostered was greatly hindered by time constraints and an administrator that sat in on the conversation. However, the questions posed by Dr. Dougherty were insightful and the responses to the questions we posed back at him were honestly answered.
The rest of the day Riders spent engaging students and challenging them to think about the policy, how this policy aligns/contradicts Christian teachings, the intersection of justice and faith and sexuality, and just asking and answering questions. Personally, I had some really great discussions. During one of these with a student I tried to explain the difference between a sexual act and an identity. A question posed to me that I had not been asked before was, “If a lesbian couple does not engage in sexual activity, how is this different than two female friends?” I must admit it took me by surprise because it was so obvious to me, but I had to take a step back and admire this person for being courageous enough to admit ignorance and willing to be vulnerable by asking an honest question. These are the kinds of questions that students want to know; the kind of questions that could be answered within the safe spaces of a Queer/Straight Alliance if Baylor would allow one to exist.
Promptly at four o’clock, in accordance with our agreement, we boarded the bus and left campus. We rolled to a nearby park where Jaxon and Mia had planned a Variety Show. Under a pavilion with the sun shining down on us people shared a part of their lives with a friendly and eager audience. We had a little bit of everything. The show included spoken word, dance routines, slam poetry, queer skits, original music, and amazing ‘coming out’ testimonies that had the crowd in thunderous applause. In my own Equality Ride experience and after such a depleting day, this reminder of the wonderful and amazing community and culture I belong to, affirmed and replenished my belief in my faith, my cause, and my friends.
Mia and Jaxon, the Stop Planners for the school, coordinated a different approach this year and negotiated with administrator’s permission on campus to speak to students, faculty, and staff. So at 9am we walked onto campus excited to engage in dialogue and common ground. Nick and I volunteered to join in on a Philosophy class led by Dr. Dougherty who was the only Professor on campus to facilitate any kind of discussion or incorporate our visit into a class. This, I am sure, had a lot to do with the fact that Baylor did not send any type of e-mail announcing our visit and kept it very silent up until a day or two ago that they sent an e-mail that could be considered condescending (at best) by many. Kudos to Prof. Dougherty who I feel had the best intentions. It was disappointing that the dialogue that this opportunity fostered was greatly hindered by time constraints and an administrator that sat in on the conversation. However, the questions posed by Dr. Dougherty were insightful and the responses to the questions we posed back at him were honestly answered.
The rest of the day Riders spent engaging students and challenging them to think about the policy, how this policy aligns/contradicts Christian teachings, the intersection of justice and faith and sexuality, and just asking and answering questions. Personally, I had some really great discussions. During one of these with a student I tried to explain the difference between a sexual act and an identity. A question posed to me that I had not been asked before was, “If a lesbian couple does not engage in sexual activity, how is this different than two female friends?” I must admit it took me by surprise because it was so obvious to me, but I had to take a step back and admire this person for being courageous enough to admit ignorance and willing to be vulnerable by asking an honest question. These are the kinds of questions that students want to know; the kind of questions that could be answered within the safe spaces of a Queer/Straight Alliance if Baylor would allow one to exist.
Promptly at four o’clock, in accordance with our agreement, we boarded the bus and left campus. We rolled to a nearby park where Jaxon and Mia had planned a Variety Show. Under a pavilion with the sun shining down on us people shared a part of their lives with a friendly and eager audience. We had a little bit of everything. The show included spoken word, dance routines, slam poetry, queer skits, original music, and amazing ‘coming out’ testimonies that had the crowd in thunderous applause. In my own Equality Ride experience and after such a depleting day, this reminder of the wonderful and amazing community and culture I belong to, affirmed and replenished my belief in my faith, my cause, and my friends.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Response to Malone Student
Dear Student,
First I’d like to thank you for contacting me because I know that it takes a lot of courage and strength to speak your mind. No, I have not received many letters in opposition to our visit. None, actually. In my opinion, your comments and questions are directed in a Christ-like manner and this type of dialogue is what the Equality Ride is all about. Your letter poses some wonderful questions that get right to the heart of why we, 25 activists, leave our families and loved ones and go around the country for two months to visit colleges and universities. I hope to do your letter justice by answering below; however, it would be ideal if you can meet up with us any of the three days we will be in Canton, OH as I am sure the answers I give will open up more questions and comments!
Before I go on, I’d like to clear something up. While it is true that homophobia is successfully spread by religion and maintained by the church, not all the Riders feel oppressed by the Christian faith. Personally, I go to an affirming church and am happy to say I am Christian and queer :)
You inquire why we are visiting your campus, and especially since all types of public displays of affection are discouraged. My answer is simply that there are students on your campus that are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer and have not broken the covenant of celibacy, and might be perfectly happy to not engage in PDA. You see, our society has made “homosexuality” such a taboo that people find it very difficult to separate the Identity with the sexual act. If you don’t know any queer people, don’t learn or talk about it in school or at home, and all the information you receive about queer folks is linked to sex or sexual behavior, of course, that’s all you’re going to think about when the topic comes up. However, these students have a need to talk about their feelings, their experiences, their fears. Just as every other student on campus feels safe enough to ask questions, the Equality Ride is going to Malone in hopes that we can open up safe spaces for LGBTQ students to talk and ask questions too, without feeling like they are wrong for it, and feel safe about doing so. These questions range from what should I wear on my first date, to how do I tell my parents and faith community? What does the Bible say? What are these things I feel inside? I’m not attracted to the opposite gender, what does that mean? Students right now are suffering in an imposed silence.
Your second question, summed up, asks: People enter Malone fully aware of its rules, why would Soulforce choose to protest at a school where students have signed an agreement to participate to Malone’s standards? I have to admit, we get this all the time. There is a simple answer is that Malone is a fine institution with a rich and wonderful history and faith. Students that go to Malone have chosen to do so based on this and the programs offered there. It is not my understanding that the Quaker/Evangelical Friends have a tradition of excluding people, and so if a prospective student has their heart set on Malone, has passed all the GPA/testing requirements, and abides by the agreement that every other student abides by…why would they not go to Malone? Malone has a discriminatory policy that can change and evolve to include all minority/oppressed groups and we come to dialogue in regards to how this could best be achieved.
It is also possible that students entered Malone questioning or not fully understanding their sexual orientation. Or their parents push them to attend their alma mater, or do not allow room to choose any other institution. These are difficult positions to be in (especially if the parents are paying for tuition). Once a student has a loving faith community and is involved in student life it is very difficult to face the decision of walking away from it all or letting their parents know why they shouldn’t go to a school! Some of the schools we visit find out that a student has been dating, or is “outed” by a friend that heard a phone call (or similar) and the school forces them into “reparative therapy” and contacts the family or expels the student. Once the student finds themselves without their faith community, family, friends, and school…what happens to them? If you found yourself completely rejected by everyone and everything you ever loved, what would you do? Did you know that LGBTQ individuals are 3 to 7 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterpart? These are not made up statistics. Kids are killing themselves and being killed. We have had several Riders that have experienced this. Feel free to talk to them more in depth about their personal experiences.
Your final question asks how Soulforce responds to biblical passages that define marriage as the union of one man and one woman. This conversation, in my experience, has taken upwards of an hour and is most commonly a give and take because of the different interpretations of the Bible between denominations and person by person. In a nutshell, and not doing your question justice, I must ask you to look in the Bible and find where it condemns the union of two people of the same gender. It does not. Jesus didn’t say anything against it and the Bible doesn’t mention a healthy, committed, loving relationship between two people of the same gender. To talk about this more in depth, please come to any one of our community events. I can also send you online resources.
April 23rd 7pm – United Church of Christ Panel Discussion with the Equality Riders
April 24th 8pm – Community party/gathering Venue TBA
April 25th 9am - Bible Study focusing on Clobber Passages and Worship Service at 10:30am
You end saying, “what may be false to you is true to someone else and vice versa. Why is your truth more important than someone else’s? Does not equality embrace individual beliefs for all?” I don’t believe that there is one truth that is more important than another in this case and I do not want to draw a line between people. It is a misunderstanding on Malone’s part of what exactly equality means. It is completely possible to treat everyone as equal human beings with justice, love, and respect without compromising your (or their) faith. The Bible has at different points in history been used to justify the inequitable treatment of many different groups of people. As humanity has progressed it has understood that as Christians of faith we cannot continue allowing a certain group to be marginalized, oppressed, discriminated, and treated as less than because it is simply not Christ-like. This has not invalidated the Bible, and has only succeeded in strengthening the faith and message. It is the way in which progressives have renewed our understanding of the Bible time and time again that has brought the Word into the 21st century, with God’s will, of course.
I hope this has helped. Please e-mail me with more questions, but I hope to see you at any of the other community events.
Blessings,
Sabrina Diz
First I’d like to thank you for contacting me because I know that it takes a lot of courage and strength to speak your mind. No, I have not received many letters in opposition to our visit. None, actually. In my opinion, your comments and questions are directed in a Christ-like manner and this type of dialogue is what the Equality Ride is all about. Your letter poses some wonderful questions that get right to the heart of why we, 25 activists, leave our families and loved ones and go around the country for two months to visit colleges and universities. I hope to do your letter justice by answering below; however, it would be ideal if you can meet up with us any of the three days we will be in Canton, OH as I am sure the answers I give will open up more questions and comments!
Before I go on, I’d like to clear something up. While it is true that homophobia is successfully spread by religion and maintained by the church, not all the Riders feel oppressed by the Christian faith. Personally, I go to an affirming church and am happy to say I am Christian and queer :)
You inquire why we are visiting your campus, and especially since all types of public displays of affection are discouraged. My answer is simply that there are students on your campus that are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer and have not broken the covenant of celibacy, and might be perfectly happy to not engage in PDA. You see, our society has made “homosexuality” such a taboo that people find it very difficult to separate the Identity with the sexual act. If you don’t know any queer people, don’t learn or talk about it in school or at home, and all the information you receive about queer folks is linked to sex or sexual behavior, of course, that’s all you’re going to think about when the topic comes up. However, these students have a need to talk about their feelings, their experiences, their fears. Just as every other student on campus feels safe enough to ask questions, the Equality Ride is going to Malone in hopes that we can open up safe spaces for LGBTQ students to talk and ask questions too, without feeling like they are wrong for it, and feel safe about doing so. These questions range from what should I wear on my first date, to how do I tell my parents and faith community? What does the Bible say? What are these things I feel inside? I’m not attracted to the opposite gender, what does that mean? Students right now are suffering in an imposed silence.
Your second question, summed up, asks: People enter Malone fully aware of its rules, why would Soulforce choose to protest at a school where students have signed an agreement to participate to Malone’s standards? I have to admit, we get this all the time. There is a simple answer is that Malone is a fine institution with a rich and wonderful history and faith. Students that go to Malone have chosen to do so based on this and the programs offered there. It is not my understanding that the Quaker/Evangelical Friends have a tradition of excluding people, and so if a prospective student has their heart set on Malone, has passed all the GPA/testing requirements, and abides by the agreement that every other student abides by…why would they not go to Malone? Malone has a discriminatory policy that can change and evolve to include all minority/oppressed groups and we come to dialogue in regards to how this could best be achieved.
It is also possible that students entered Malone questioning or not fully understanding their sexual orientation. Or their parents push them to attend their alma mater, or do not allow room to choose any other institution. These are difficult positions to be in (especially if the parents are paying for tuition). Once a student has a loving faith community and is involved in student life it is very difficult to face the decision of walking away from it all or letting their parents know why they shouldn’t go to a school! Some of the schools we visit find out that a student has been dating, or is “outed” by a friend that heard a phone call (or similar) and the school forces them into “reparative therapy” and contacts the family or expels the student. Once the student finds themselves without their faith community, family, friends, and school…what happens to them? If you found yourself completely rejected by everyone and everything you ever loved, what would you do? Did you know that LGBTQ individuals are 3 to 7 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterpart? These are not made up statistics. Kids are killing themselves and being killed. We have had several Riders that have experienced this. Feel free to talk to them more in depth about their personal experiences.
Your final question asks how Soulforce responds to biblical passages that define marriage as the union of one man and one woman. This conversation, in my experience, has taken upwards of an hour and is most commonly a give and take because of the different interpretations of the Bible between denominations and person by person. In a nutshell, and not doing your question justice, I must ask you to look in the Bible and find where it condemns the union of two people of the same gender. It does not. Jesus didn’t say anything against it and the Bible doesn’t mention a healthy, committed, loving relationship between two people of the same gender. To talk about this more in depth, please come to any one of our community events. I can also send you online resources.
April 23rd 7pm – United Church of Christ Panel Discussion with the Equality Riders
April 24th 8pm – Community party/gathering Venue TBA
April 25th 9am - Bible Study focusing on Clobber Passages and Worship Service at 10:30am
You end saying, “what may be false to you is true to someone else and vice versa. Why is your truth more important than someone else’s? Does not equality embrace individual beliefs for all?” I don’t believe that there is one truth that is more important than another in this case and I do not want to draw a line between people. It is a misunderstanding on Malone’s part of what exactly equality means. It is completely possible to treat everyone as equal human beings with justice, love, and respect without compromising your (or their) faith. The Bible has at different points in history been used to justify the inequitable treatment of many different groups of people. As humanity has progressed it has understood that as Christians of faith we cannot continue allowing a certain group to be marginalized, oppressed, discriminated, and treated as less than because it is simply not Christ-like. This has not invalidated the Bible, and has only succeeded in strengthening the faith and message. It is the way in which progressives have renewed our understanding of the Bible time and time again that has brought the Word into the 21st century, with God’s will, of course.
I hope this has helped. Please e-mail me with more questions, but I hope to see you at any of the other community events.
Blessings,
Sabrina Diz
Friday, March 19, 2010
3/17 3/18 3/19 in North Carolina
My posts here are commentaries also posted on www.goqnotes.com an LGBTQ resource/news site:
March 17
Yesterday we got together and talked about SouthEastern Baptist Theological Seminary (SEBTS). The administration was reluctant to let us do much more than attend Chapel with students and staff. They added that they thought it was "ludicrous" for us to request time for open dialogue with students on campus and denied our requests to hold workshops or discussions. I'm not sure what is so crazy about an institution of higher learning allowing for students to have a safe space to talk and ask questions, especially when these students are going to graduate and one day find themselves in need of answers to questions on the intersection of justice, faith, and sexuality.
The Stop Planner, Kimmy DeVries, decided to accept their invitation to Chapel; after all, she believes that it came from a place of love. Chapel and service went smoothly. Aside from personally perceiving the Minister to be extremely sexist, it was a good sermon with an honest message. Ironically, the message was on "practice what you preach" and the gap between your faith and your character.
Essentially, the sermon is exactly what the Equality Ride is all about. Our goal is to allow the schools that we visit to re-examine the ways in which they act toward the LGBTQ community and the ways in which Christian values call us to actually behave. SEBTS has a policy that discriminates against queer students. The school holds a vague school policy that deams "homosexual behavior" as synonymous to sexual immorality and this, in our view, does nothing to promote safety for the queer community on campus. We believe that this is equal to spiritual violence and can easily be understood to justify other kinds of violence.
So after Chapel we spoke to students that came up to us for about twenty minutes. I had great conversation with three female students. The conversation switched back and forth between the Bible, ethics, and morality. It was deep and yet lighthearted. Moments in time that feel like you're talking to old friends. As I looked around I noticed that I was not the only one. There were dozens of students interested in chatting with us! Unfortunately, security sternly asked that we leave. Afraid of getting arrested, we had to go.
We drove on the big, queer bus to a corner right outside of school grounds and vigiled. The songs attracted some students, including one of the girls who I was speaking to earlier! We continued talking, and even though we debated on some fundamental beliefs of scripture (most notably that I don't believe being queer is a sin) we absolute agreed that justice is a cornerstone of Christianity.
Soon after we moved on to a public park where even more students showed up to continue dialogue. It was a beautiful sunny day and perfect for making friends. Some students and Riders were engaged in heady discussion and debate, however, it was never angry or violent. I truly believe that Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary could have easily provided a space for all this to occur, and it is a shame that they blew a chance at providing all their students an opportunity to practice what they preach.
March 18
As Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary and Campbell University are relatively close to each other, this year the Equality Ride decided that we could reach out to students of both campuses during a three day stop. Normally it is emotionally as well as mentally draining to visit a campus. Not that I’m complaining, this is what drives me, but justifying our views, beliefs, and identities day after day is not an easy task. As the bus drove into the parking lot this morning we were all exhausted from yesterday and yet still very excited since Campbell invited us on and agreed to host us for most of the day. After SEBTS’ experience yesterday I believe I can speak for everyone when I say we hoped for a warmer welcome.
It was extremely disappointing to see that the schedule for the day was so tightly controlled. Again, there was very little time allowed for student/Rider interaction. After a presentation by our Riders in the auditorium that went pleasantly well, instead of continuing with the lively discussion, the President of the school talked about Campbell history for over an hour. It was a deliberate tactic on their part in order to deter and derail conversation. Afterward we were ushered out to a campus tour and then to a closed area for lunch that was “by invitation only”. During lunch the speaker talked about football and school legends for at least a half hour, after cutting off dialogue between the Riders and students that had begun organically. Even though the moderator did his best to frustrate our efforts the students were genuinely interested in engaging us. One gay and out student in particular has worked ceaselessly to have a Gay/Straight Alliance (GSA) approved on campus and boldly spoke out, telling the moderator that he was sorely disappointed at the school’s stance and their inability to take action. It was a shining moment. While the 25 of us have many wonderful points to make, ideas to share, and are eager to engage in conversation Alexey Bulokhob (2006 Rider) said it best when he said: “The Equality Ride bus is like a giant mirror. Each school that we visit gets to view themselves in it and how their campus reflects Christian love.” Because of this we always prefer when we can sit back in amazement as students stand up for what is right and just in the face of administrators and faculty that have forgotten what those values look like.
Some of us were talking afterwards and agreed that whatever the welcome we receive it will be properly judged only after we are gone, once we can evaluate the welcome queer students on campus continue to experience. After leaving campus we got together close by with queer students and talked together about their experiences at Campbell, their frustrations, and their need for a safe space to talk and continue to share. I felt saddened that I did not have the opportunity to connect and share with more students today. It felt awful to be so controlled and manipulated, treated so much less than I am used to by my own Christian brethren! The boldfaced lies by faculty and deliberate minimal student interaction was discouraging, but we find hope in the courage of the students who are working diligently to create a safe space on Campbell University and we are committed to working with them until this goal is achieved.
In love, justice, and solidarity…
Sabrina
March 19 - Chapel Hill
The Equality Ride visited UNC Chapel Hill today. We met up at the LGBTQ Resource Center on campus, met with supporters, and also showed a screening of "Equality U", a documentary of the first Equality Ride in 2006. It is our hope that if students and community members are aware of our efforts since they are right around the corner from the schools we visited, Southeastern Baptist Theoogical Seminary and Campbell University, they would be willing to help. Indeed, many UNC students signed up to be a part of the winds of change that are blowing through these other school!
As I sat with my fellow Riders at the resource center playing games and chatting with UNC students it struck me that I felt safe. I felt sure and at ease and safe. My fellow Riders and the students from UNC all chatted and spoke out loud words like "queer" and "gender" and "lesbian" without worrying about a backlash or consequences or losing their community. It was the first time that I was on a school campus and felt almost at home and it really struck me that this was how all students could feel everywhere, without toppling the faith or moral structure of the school. These thoughts sat heavy on my chest because I know that it will be a long time before the sense of safety UNC students felt is experienced by students everywhere.
Tomorrow we travel to Daytona, Fl to attempt to enter an entire community where homophobia persists. As someone who is originally from Miami, it never occurrred to me that Daytona would be an unwelcoming town. However, it has been very difficult to have people even respond to our letters! So our big, queer bus is on its way out of the Bible Belt for a little bit, but not yet out of the woods!
Follow us at: Soulforce.org or write to me at Sabrina_Diz@equalityride.com
March 17
Yesterday we got together and talked about SouthEastern Baptist Theological Seminary (SEBTS). The administration was reluctant to let us do much more than attend Chapel with students and staff. They added that they thought it was "ludicrous" for us to request time for open dialogue with students on campus and denied our requests to hold workshops or discussions. I'm not sure what is so crazy about an institution of higher learning allowing for students to have a safe space to talk and ask questions, especially when these students are going to graduate and one day find themselves in need of answers to questions on the intersection of justice, faith, and sexuality.
The Stop Planner, Kimmy DeVries, decided to accept their invitation to Chapel; after all, she believes that it came from a place of love. Chapel and service went smoothly. Aside from personally perceiving the Minister to be extremely sexist, it was a good sermon with an honest message. Ironically, the message was on "practice what you preach" and the gap between your faith and your character.
Essentially, the sermon is exactly what the Equality Ride is all about. Our goal is to allow the schools that we visit to re-examine the ways in which they act toward the LGBTQ community and the ways in which Christian values call us to actually behave. SEBTS has a policy that discriminates against queer students. The school holds a vague school policy that deams "homosexual behavior" as synonymous to sexual immorality and this, in our view, does nothing to promote safety for the queer community on campus. We believe that this is equal to spiritual violence and can easily be understood to justify other kinds of violence.
So after Chapel we spoke to students that came up to us for about twenty minutes. I had great conversation with three female students. The conversation switched back and forth between the Bible, ethics, and morality. It was deep and yet lighthearted. Moments in time that feel like you're talking to old friends. As I looked around I noticed that I was not the only one. There were dozens of students interested in chatting with us! Unfortunately, security sternly asked that we leave. Afraid of getting arrested, we had to go.
We drove on the big, queer bus to a corner right outside of school grounds and vigiled. The songs attracted some students, including one of the girls who I was speaking to earlier! We continued talking, and even though we debated on some fundamental beliefs of scripture (most notably that I don't believe being queer is a sin) we absolute agreed that justice is a cornerstone of Christianity.
Soon after we moved on to a public park where even more students showed up to continue dialogue. It was a beautiful sunny day and perfect for making friends. Some students and Riders were engaged in heady discussion and debate, however, it was never angry or violent. I truly believe that Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary could have easily provided a space for all this to occur, and it is a shame that they blew a chance at providing all their students an opportunity to practice what they preach.
March 18
As Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary and Campbell University are relatively close to each other, this year the Equality Ride decided that we could reach out to students of both campuses during a three day stop. Normally it is emotionally as well as mentally draining to visit a campus. Not that I’m complaining, this is what drives me, but justifying our views, beliefs, and identities day after day is not an easy task. As the bus drove into the parking lot this morning we were all exhausted from yesterday and yet still very excited since Campbell invited us on and agreed to host us for most of the day. After SEBTS’ experience yesterday I believe I can speak for everyone when I say we hoped for a warmer welcome.
It was extremely disappointing to see that the schedule for the day was so tightly controlled. Again, there was very little time allowed for student/Rider interaction. After a presentation by our Riders in the auditorium that went pleasantly well, instead of continuing with the lively discussion, the President of the school talked about Campbell history for over an hour. It was a deliberate tactic on their part in order to deter and derail conversation. Afterward we were ushered out to a campus tour and then to a closed area for lunch that was “by invitation only”. During lunch the speaker talked about football and school legends for at least a half hour, after cutting off dialogue between the Riders and students that had begun organically. Even though the moderator did his best to frustrate our efforts the students were genuinely interested in engaging us. One gay and out student in particular has worked ceaselessly to have a Gay/Straight Alliance (GSA) approved on campus and boldly spoke out, telling the moderator that he was sorely disappointed at the school’s stance and their inability to take action. It was a shining moment. While the 25 of us have many wonderful points to make, ideas to share, and are eager to engage in conversation Alexey Bulokhob (2006 Rider) said it best when he said: “The Equality Ride bus is like a giant mirror. Each school that we visit gets to view themselves in it and how their campus reflects Christian love.” Because of this we always prefer when we can sit back in amazement as students stand up for what is right and just in the face of administrators and faculty that have forgotten what those values look like.
Some of us were talking afterwards and agreed that whatever the welcome we receive it will be properly judged only after we are gone, once we can evaluate the welcome queer students on campus continue to experience. After leaving campus we got together close by with queer students and talked together about their experiences at Campbell, their frustrations, and their need for a safe space to talk and continue to share. I felt saddened that I did not have the opportunity to connect and share with more students today. It felt awful to be so controlled and manipulated, treated so much less than I am used to by my own Christian brethren! The boldfaced lies by faculty and deliberate minimal student interaction was discouraging, but we find hope in the courage of the students who are working diligently to create a safe space on Campbell University and we are committed to working with them until this goal is achieved.
In love, justice, and solidarity…
Sabrina
March 19 - Chapel Hill
The Equality Ride visited UNC Chapel Hill today. We met up at the LGBTQ Resource Center on campus, met with supporters, and also showed a screening of "Equality U", a documentary of the first Equality Ride in 2006. It is our hope that if students and community members are aware of our efforts since they are right around the corner from the schools we visited, Southeastern Baptist Theoogical Seminary and Campbell University, they would be willing to help. Indeed, many UNC students signed up to be a part of the winds of change that are blowing through these other school!
As I sat with my fellow Riders at the resource center playing games and chatting with UNC students it struck me that I felt safe. I felt sure and at ease and safe. My fellow Riders and the students from UNC all chatted and spoke out loud words like "queer" and "gender" and "lesbian" without worrying about a backlash or consequences or losing their community. It was the first time that I was on a school campus and felt almost at home and it really struck me that this was how all students could feel everywhere, without toppling the faith or moral structure of the school. These thoughts sat heavy on my chest because I know that it will be a long time before the sense of safety UNC students felt is experienced by students everywhere.
Tomorrow we travel to Daytona, Fl to attempt to enter an entire community where homophobia persists. As someone who is originally from Miami, it never occurrred to me that Daytona would be an unwelcoming town. However, it has been very difficult to have people even respond to our letters! So our big, queer bus is on its way out of the Bible Belt for a little bit, but not yet out of the woods!
Follow us at: Soulforce.org or write to me at Sabrina_Diz@equalityride.com
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Letter to a Friend
My dear and sorely missed friend....
I've been hoping to get a chance to talk to you for days now. It saddens me that I left you at a time when you might just need a friend most of all. I hope that this is mostly my guilty conscience, and that you're doing just fine. It's hard to go do what I'm passionate about, and leave behind the people that ignited the flame.
Alabama was amazing. It is truly my favorite Stop so far. It went smoothly; well, smoother than we all thought it would go. The trouble was that Oakwood University sent an e-mail to all their students that not only let their students know we were coming, but told them that if they felt 'unsafe' to call Campus Police and also that we were 'trained very well and any form of debate would be fruitless and unsuccessful'. It really sounded as if they painted us as a militant group looking to cause trouble. You know me...I can hear you laughing at this. Can you picture me as militant? Maybe loud and obnoxioux, but roudy and violent? Well, it scared us because the last thing we wanted was students thinking we were out to push any sort of agenda at all costs.
Anyway, our Bus was led to a building so far off campus, in such a roundabout way, that no student saw us. According to a "source" we were led to the Health building that is only technically on campus. We were ushered into a room with photographers and video cameras and although we were treated respectfully (and by this I mean people shook our hands and introduced themselves and we were offered seating) there were about 6 to 10 students and the rest of the 50 people were administrators and faculty. The seating was in rows with an aisle down the middle, and at the front was a pulpit; decked out with a bold cross. It was set up for service, yet the paper that was handed out stated "Dialogue" albeit in quotation marks. It was almost painful to see my fellow Riders so nervous, because I love and care each one and know that how they were perceived, and indeed understood, was so far from who they are.
It was slow to begin, but as uncomfortable as it was to talk to each other a nice flow of conversation ensued. No thanks to administration, that in my opinion made it as uneasy as possible, but to the students that were genuinely interested in learning our purpose. To those brave souls (they were indeed as brave as us) my wholehearted thanks. They reminded us why we travel around leaving jobs, friends, loved ones, and those comforts like a cold drink or passing by your mailbox and experiencing the feeling of "belonging" as you carry bills and letters into your home. We redirected attempts to reduce our whole identities to a sex act eloquently and Oakwood students brought the conversation back to common ground and shared Christian values beautifully. After an hour that quenched no one's thirst, they ushered us into lunch. There we were able to continue "dialogue" with students as cameras inches from our faces worked furiously to annoy, distract, and intimidate. We were not allowed any type of releases on this material, as our acceptance to speak to students on campus "annulled our right to refuse to be photographed". We have also not been told how this material will be used. And, of course, we were not allowed to photograph or videotape. If I wasn't as resolute in my love for God, this display would have shaken my faith. Most of the people there were Theology professors, ministers and preachers; the students were all Theology majors (as fitting of the criteria "the list of invited Oakwood staff and students" had to fulfill to attend). And yet as the strangers, the foreigners, the marginalized, and the oppressed we were treated with disrespect and injustice. Even as I write this, I feel pressured to erase the words and be grateful for what we were given as I am sure Oakwood would like us to be. But I'm outraged that I should be happy with crumbs as they ate so fully in front of me.
If the school would have given us a proper welcome, let us speak to those students that really needed to speak with us. If the administrators would have treated as full human beings and allowed us the intellectual dialogue and not stood between the possible relationships that as Equality Riders we strive for, than we would not have felt the need to rally outside campus. Our intent was to hold a vigil; however, students began arriving almost immediately and they wanted to talk! Imagine that! Adult college educated people interested in learning about others. It was an interesting stop for me. Our last few stops had been primarily White schools and communities in which I felt as if on the perimeter of all conversation and social interaction. It actually wasn't very noticeable until I started speaking with Oakwood, a Historically Black Institution (HBI). Once I did, I felt more comfortable. And that's all I can say about that, only because some things have no words.
Students followed us to Chilli's and even to our hotel lobby afterwards to continue conversations and talk about their own experiences. It was quite noticeable that students were outraged at how we were treated, the policy against LGBTQ students, and many policies that was oppressive for all students. Even though I came away with a feeling of fear, fear that once we left students would feel like there were too many problems for students to fix, the connections we made with LGBTQ students on campus lead me to believe that in the very least, we spread hope and affirmation. And that's pretty okay with me, too.
So that was our last campus visit. The day before, we went out to a gay bar and met up with the community and had a lot of fun. We watched a Drag King show and laughed and danced and acted like fools :) It was so very much needed!!!! It was awesome... Let me tell you, there are some BEAUTIFUL people in Alabama!
How are you, my dear friend? I don't want my stories to overwhelm the conversation. Please tell me how you are doing, I worry!
With much love, and many blessings...
Sabrina Diz
It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home. ~Carl T. Rowan
I've been hoping to get a chance to talk to you for days now. It saddens me that I left you at a time when you might just need a friend most of all. I hope that this is mostly my guilty conscience, and that you're doing just fine. It's hard to go do what I'm passionate about, and leave behind the people that ignited the flame.
Alabama was amazing. It is truly my favorite Stop so far. It went smoothly; well, smoother than we all thought it would go. The trouble was that Oakwood University sent an e-mail to all their students that not only let their students know we were coming, but told them that if they felt 'unsafe' to call Campus Police and also that we were 'trained very well and any form of debate would be fruitless and unsuccessful'. It really sounded as if they painted us as a militant group looking to cause trouble. You know me...I can hear you laughing at this. Can you picture me as militant? Maybe loud and obnoxioux, but roudy and violent? Well, it scared us because the last thing we wanted was students thinking we were out to push any sort of agenda at all costs.
Anyway, our Bus was led to a building so far off campus, in such a roundabout way, that no student saw us. According to a "source" we were led to the Health building that is only technically on campus. We were ushered into a room with photographers and video cameras and although we were treated respectfully (and by this I mean people shook our hands and introduced themselves and we were offered seating) there were about 6 to 10 students and the rest of the 50 people were administrators and faculty. The seating was in rows with an aisle down the middle, and at the front was a pulpit; decked out with a bold cross. It was set up for service, yet the paper that was handed out stated "Dialogue" albeit in quotation marks. It was almost painful to see my fellow Riders so nervous, because I love and care each one and know that how they were perceived, and indeed understood, was so far from who they are.
It was slow to begin, but as uncomfortable as it was to talk to each other a nice flow of conversation ensued. No thanks to administration, that in my opinion made it as uneasy as possible, but to the students that were genuinely interested in learning our purpose. To those brave souls (they were indeed as brave as us) my wholehearted thanks. They reminded us why we travel around leaving jobs, friends, loved ones, and those comforts like a cold drink or passing by your mailbox and experiencing the feeling of "belonging" as you carry bills and letters into your home. We redirected attempts to reduce our whole identities to a sex act eloquently and Oakwood students brought the conversation back to common ground and shared Christian values beautifully. After an hour that quenched no one's thirst, they ushered us into lunch. There we were able to continue "dialogue" with students as cameras inches from our faces worked furiously to annoy, distract, and intimidate. We were not allowed any type of releases on this material, as our acceptance to speak to students on campus "annulled our right to refuse to be photographed". We have also not been told how this material will be used. And, of course, we were not allowed to photograph or videotape. If I wasn't as resolute in my love for God, this display would have shaken my faith. Most of the people there were Theology professors, ministers and preachers; the students were all Theology majors (as fitting of the criteria "the list of invited Oakwood staff and students" had to fulfill to attend). And yet as the strangers, the foreigners, the marginalized, and the oppressed we were treated with disrespect and injustice. Even as I write this, I feel pressured to erase the words and be grateful for what we were given as I am sure Oakwood would like us to be. But I'm outraged that I should be happy with crumbs as they ate so fully in front of me.
If the school would have given us a proper welcome, let us speak to those students that really needed to speak with us. If the administrators would have treated as full human beings and allowed us the intellectual dialogue and not stood between the possible relationships that as Equality Riders we strive for, than we would not have felt the need to rally outside campus. Our intent was to hold a vigil; however, students began arriving almost immediately and they wanted to talk! Imagine that! Adult college educated people interested in learning about others. It was an interesting stop for me. Our last few stops had been primarily White schools and communities in which I felt as if on the perimeter of all conversation and social interaction. It actually wasn't very noticeable until I started speaking with Oakwood, a Historically Black Institution (HBI). Once I did, I felt more comfortable. And that's all I can say about that, only because some things have no words.
Students followed us to Chilli's and even to our hotel lobby afterwards to continue conversations and talk about their own experiences. It was quite noticeable that students were outraged at how we were treated, the policy against LGBTQ students, and many policies that was oppressive for all students. Even though I came away with a feeling of fear, fear that once we left students would feel like there were too many problems for students to fix, the connections we made with LGBTQ students on campus lead me to believe that in the very least, we spread hope and affirmation. And that's pretty okay with me, too.
So that was our last campus visit. The day before, we went out to a gay bar and met up with the community and had a lot of fun. We watched a Drag King show and laughed and danced and acted like fools :) It was so very much needed!!!! It was awesome... Let me tell you, there are some BEAUTIFUL people in Alabama!
How are you, my dear friend? I don't want my stories to overwhelm the conversation. Please tell me how you are doing, I worry!
With much love, and many blessings...
Sabrina Diz
It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home. ~Carl T. Rowan
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Letter From Houghton College Student
I couldn't believe that you guys would leave something for me--I didn't understand what I did that was so deserving. I went down to the inn and Steph gave me the card and t-shirt, and we just broke down together.
We have done nothing extraordinary for you all. We've met friends to look up to, people who are taking a stand and working for something that is bigger than they are. You guys are heroes. You are acting as a voice for those who cannot speak. You are hands for those who cannot reach and feet for those who cannot move. You're doing incredible work for God and humanity. He is proud, and he is doing mighty things through you all.
WE are so grateful to have YOU ROCKSTARS as our friends. We are more than happy, we are convicted and dedicated to continuing the work you've started on Houghton's campus. It is not a favor to you, but rather or duty as people, as children of God.
It's already proving to be quite a challenge. I was faced with hurt and realism in an upperlevel class yesterday as students said they thought the day was a success BECAUSE you all were tucked in a room and they were not "forced to interact." I almost started to cry in class, because they didn't realize how hurtful their words were. Even if they see any sexual orientation outside of one man (as recognized at birth) and one woman (as recognized at birth) as a sin, then they should look to follow Jesus Christ as their example and seek conversation with the hurt, the downtrodden and the outcasts. I hate complacency and comfort in ignorance, closed minds! It breaks my heart, because with that kind of thinking, no growth can take place.
ANYWAY, thank you so much for the card and shirt. I will wear it with pride. Steph and I are looking to put together the first QSA very soon, so if you'd like to put our names out there to students who have contacted you, please feel free. Also, you may absolutely put a link to my blog on the soulforce website. I'd be proud to be associated with you and the work you're doing!
Thank you again, Jason! I hope you are having an awesome time in Rochester today!
Love,
Sonja
We have done nothing extraordinary for you all. We've met friends to look up to, people who are taking a stand and working for something that is bigger than they are. You guys are heroes. You are acting as a voice for those who cannot speak. You are hands for those who cannot reach and feet for those who cannot move. You're doing incredible work for God and humanity. He is proud, and he is doing mighty things through you all.
WE are so grateful to have YOU ROCKSTARS as our friends. We are more than happy, we are convicted and dedicated to continuing the work you've started on Houghton's campus. It is not a favor to you, but rather or duty as people, as children of God.
It's already proving to be quite a challenge. I was faced with hurt and realism in an upperlevel class yesterday as students said they thought the day was a success BECAUSE you all were tucked in a room and they were not "forced to interact." I almost started to cry in class, because they didn't realize how hurtful their words were. Even if they see any sexual orientation outside of one man (as recognized at birth) and one woman (as recognized at birth) as a sin, then they should look to follow Jesus Christ as their example and seek conversation with the hurt, the downtrodden and the outcasts. I hate complacency and comfort in ignorance, closed minds! It breaks my heart, because with that kind of thinking, no growth can take place.
ANYWAY, thank you so much for the card and shirt. I will wear it with pride. Steph and I are looking to put together the first QSA very soon, so if you'd like to put our names out there to students who have contacted you, please feel free. Also, you may absolutely put a link to my blog on the soulforce website. I'd be proud to be associated with you and the work you're doing!
Thank you again, Jason! I hope you are having an awesome time in Rochester today!
Love,
Sonja
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Houghton - Continued....
This is for those out there that might doubt our impact. It is a blog from a student at Houghton College. Inspiring!!!!
http://sonjablade.wordpress.com/
http://sonjablade.wordpress.com/
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Houghton College in Houghton, NY
Today was really the first welcoming school and so the first time we were able to get on campus and really get into dialogue with students and staff. It was stated from the beginning by the administration that "at the end of the day they would agree to disagree" but that the dialogue would be welcome. This was discouraging. Knowing that the administration was going into this conversation with a firm decision in mind (of not to change anything at all), to me, isn't dialogue. Dialogue for me is an exchange of ideas with an open mind to learn from the other person and keep yourself open to the possibilities.
While the administration kept up this facade of "dialogue" it didn't get me down one bit because the students were genuine. At first I was extremely anxious and nervous. After three cups of coffee I was worried I wouldn't be able to shake hands with anyone, either! However, it was really interesting.
Each one of us Riders had a "host". I'm assuming the host's job was to aid us in not getting lost around campus (ahem), guide conversation, and protect us as much as the students from any "inappropriateness" (what this would be, I'm not completely sure). I couldn't figure my host out at first. I didn't know if he was for or against me, what his role was exactly, or how much influence he would have over the other students that would come up to talk to me. Because I wasn't really sure what to expect I just started asking questions. Purposeful and intentional questions, but I didn't want to go into any type of shpeal. My first question was geared toward the policy at Houghton that warns against "homosexual activity" and so I asked, "What do you think is considered heterosexual behavior?"
I thought it was witty and serious at the same time. It was really important for me to establish a difference between my sexual orientation and my sexuality, or at least what I may or may not do while in bed with another individual. And I was surprised that the conversation stayed at a serious level all the while being open, honest, respectful, and absolutely affirming. It was GREAT! It was my discovery that while the school administrators were not open to the possibility of change, the students thought quite differently. Perhaps things haven't progressed on this campus is because these conversations weren't happening before we arrived, and in the past few months the school has teethed with sexuality conversations in preparation of our arrival. It is my hope that the students will take over from here and continue these conversations. It is in their hands, and I feel confident that the matter won't be easily dropped, and LGBTQ students on campus no longer ignored. That is me thinking positively, of course, and only time will tell...
While the administration kept up this facade of "dialogue" it didn't get me down one bit because the students were genuine. At first I was extremely anxious and nervous. After three cups of coffee I was worried I wouldn't be able to shake hands with anyone, either! However, it was really interesting.
Each one of us Riders had a "host". I'm assuming the host's job was to aid us in not getting lost around campus (ahem), guide conversation, and protect us as much as the students from any "inappropriateness" (what this would be, I'm not completely sure). I couldn't figure my host out at first. I didn't know if he was for or against me, what his role was exactly, or how much influence he would have over the other students that would come up to talk to me. Because I wasn't really sure what to expect I just started asking questions. Purposeful and intentional questions, but I didn't want to go into any type of shpeal. My first question was geared toward the policy at Houghton that warns against "homosexual activity" and so I asked, "What do you think is considered heterosexual behavior?"
I thought it was witty and serious at the same time. It was really important for me to establish a difference between my sexual orientation and my sexuality, or at least what I may or may not do while in bed with another individual. And I was surprised that the conversation stayed at a serious level all the while being open, honest, respectful, and absolutely affirming. It was GREAT! It was my discovery that while the school administrators were not open to the possibility of change, the students thought quite differently. Perhaps things haven't progressed on this campus is because these conversations weren't happening before we arrived, and in the past few months the school has teethed with sexuality conversations in preparation of our arrival. It is my hope that the students will take over from here and continue these conversations. It is in their hands, and I feel confident that the matter won't be easily dropped, and LGBTQ students on campus no longer ignored. That is me thinking positively, of course, and only time will tell...
March 7th 2010
The Equality Ride Bus has left Pennsylvania and is on the way to Houghton, NY where we are barely welcomed onto Houghton College campus. Once there we’ll be treated like criminals. Each one of us Riders will have a “host” student that will walk around with us on campus, even to the bathroom. I don’t understand what they’re afraid of.
Someone today told me about having sex last night. While I am sex positive and all about having a good time, I’m not happy about this person having unprotected oral sex and I felt the heat coming up to my face…we just got tested for HIV last night (I reminded), and here they are exposing themselves again. It’s frustrating. Yet the reason I’m so upset is because I have done the same thing. When I got tested last night I had the support of my partner who drove to Philly to spend the evening with us. Kris and I were a little nervous. It had been over a year since either one of us had been tested for HIV; we also had a separation period about six months ago in which we both had unprotected sex with other people. It ran through my mind that if I tested reactive I would die from guilt because I have known better all this time. I should have had protected sex all this time with others, but I didn’t. And I could have given HIV to someone I love. How would I have made it better then? I have to wonder how one goes about apologizing for being so selfish and inconsiderate. And I also wonder how forgiveness (that is not often mentioned) must be central to the process of health and healing once an individual learns they are Positive. We both tested non-reactive, meaning that up to 3 months ago we were not infected. We plan to get tested again in three months even though it has been more than three months that we have been together and monogamous. As a couple, we have decided to be more informed, and get tested regularly for several reasons. First, how can we lead if not by example? Second, we have recent tattoos and piercings and want to be absolutely certain that the places we are going to are clean and considering the health and safety of its patrons. Lastly, regular testing means we are also keeping the issue of HIV and safe sex at the forefront of our lives. Kris and I don’t want to forget that people are dying, people in our community as well as straight folks. This isn’t just a gay issue, as much as others want to believe it is.
I’ve settled into my space on the Bus, with my belongings all around me set up in such a way that I feel like I’m camping indoors. I wanted this blog to be about Valley Forge Christian College and to talk about Repent America, and how we were encouraged by the calls and e-mails we received after our visit, vigil, and protest even though the students were not allowed to talk to us. However, there are so many other things going on throughout this Ride that I also want to share those, too.
Please feel free to ask questions regarding certain stops, and I'll answer them if my blog doesn't answer your burning questions...
The Equality Ride Bus has left Pennsylvania and is on the way to Houghton, NY where we are barely welcomed onto Houghton College campus. Once there we’ll be treated like criminals. Each one of us Riders will have a “host” student that will walk around with us on campus, even to the bathroom. I don’t understand what they’re afraid of.
Someone today told me about having sex last night. While I am sex positive and all about having a good time, I’m not happy about this person having unprotected oral sex and I felt the heat coming up to my face…we just got tested for HIV last night (I reminded), and here they are exposing themselves again. It’s frustrating. Yet the reason I’m so upset is because I have done the same thing. When I got tested last night I had the support of my partner who drove to Philly to spend the evening with us. Kris and I were a little nervous. It had been over a year since either one of us had been tested for HIV; we also had a separation period about six months ago in which we both had unprotected sex with other people. It ran through my mind that if I tested reactive I would die from guilt because I have known better all this time. I should have had protected sex all this time with others, but I didn’t. And I could have given HIV to someone I love. How would I have made it better then? I have to wonder how one goes about apologizing for being so selfish and inconsiderate. And I also wonder how forgiveness (that is not often mentioned) must be central to the process of health and healing once an individual learns they are Positive. We both tested non-reactive, meaning that up to 3 months ago we were not infected. We plan to get tested again in three months even though it has been more than three months that we have been together and monogamous. As a couple, we have decided to be more informed, and get tested regularly for several reasons. First, how can we lead if not by example? Second, we have recent tattoos and piercings and want to be absolutely certain that the places we are going to are clean and considering the health and safety of its patrons. Lastly, regular testing means we are also keeping the issue of HIV and safe sex at the forefront of our lives. Kris and I don’t want to forget that people are dying, people in our community as well as straight folks. This isn’t just a gay issue, as much as others want to believe it is.
I’ve settled into my space on the Bus, with my belongings all around me set up in such a way that I feel like I’m camping indoors. I wanted this blog to be about Valley Forge Christian College and to talk about Repent America, and how we were encouraged by the calls and e-mails we received after our visit, vigil, and protest even though the students were not allowed to talk to us. However, there are so many other things going on throughout this Ride that I also want to share those, too.
Please feel free to ask questions regarding certain stops, and I'll answer them if my blog doesn't answer your burning questions...
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Screaming for Justice
Our group spent eight trying days in Austin, Texas in January. They were long, long days. Trainings and workshops were emotionally taxing, and through our shared exhaustion and painful personal stories as well as lessons of homophobia and racism and sexism (and many other -isms) we all got very close. Fast forward almost two months later now we are thrown together again. The workshops are enervating. I'm talking about debilitating at times as they touch on some issues that are real to us. Most of us seem very tough. They are Oscar winning performance at times when we pull it off or then we run off and cry with some dignity on our own.
Today was a bit different. Rev. Dr. Mel White led a Non-violence workshop and we saw some video clips and read some very painful statements that people say about us in the name of God and Love and Justice. So sad. So we got into two lines today. Facing each other. And we were instructed to scream at the other person, one person at a time. Just as if we were standing in a vigil line, we were exposed to the nasty and excruciatingly painful experience of being belittled, judged, insulted....hated. It sounds as awful as it was. Believe it or not I was actually relieved that I was able to hug Despina beforehand, and then go into a rant about how she was a perverted, disgusting individual that needed to go back to her own country because she didn't belong here...( I also called her retarded, dirty, and stupid).
Why did we do this? Because this is going to happen. There are students, staff, parents, or other individuals that we will encounter on this Ride that will genuinely believe that these are not only things we ARE, but this is the way to treat us to "reform us" and "show us their love". It's absolutely sick, of course, but luckily we first experience it with people we love and trust instead of being just thrown into a sitation like it without knowing what to expect. (As Cait would say, "Now that would be REAL awkward and not cute.")
Afterward, we were all in shock and in tears. As soon as I heard "stop", I crumbled into Despina's arms and cried my apologies onto her. Held her as she sobbed and wondered at my own ability to do this. How twisted am I that I was able to do say these horrible things? But the exercise taught me far more about how used to the abuse we must be if being the abuser is by far more disturbing than being the abused.
It took us well over an hour to get back into some semblance of normalcy. These are my fellow Riders, my friends, my comrades, my siblings. I realize it's going to be tough to see people saying these types of things to them during this Ride. Despina's face was in pieces, and I still hear Lindsey's heaves, and picture Jason's red-rimmed eyes because they all know the pain of this hatred. Saying this has anything to do with God or Jesus Christ's teachings is saddest of all. Horribly, horribly sad.
Today was a bit different. Rev. Dr. Mel White led a Non-violence workshop and we saw some video clips and read some very painful statements that people say about us in the name of God and Love and Justice. So sad. So we got into two lines today. Facing each other. And we were instructed to scream at the other person, one person at a time. Just as if we were standing in a vigil line, we were exposed to the nasty and excruciatingly painful experience of being belittled, judged, insulted....hated. It sounds as awful as it was. Believe it or not I was actually relieved that I was able to hug Despina beforehand, and then go into a rant about how she was a perverted, disgusting individual that needed to go back to her own country because she didn't belong here...( I also called her retarded, dirty, and stupid).
Why did we do this? Because this is going to happen. There are students, staff, parents, or other individuals that we will encounter on this Ride that will genuinely believe that these are not only things we ARE, but this is the way to treat us to "reform us" and "show us their love". It's absolutely sick, of course, but luckily we first experience it with people we love and trust instead of being just thrown into a sitation like it without knowing what to expect. (As Cait would say, "Now that would be REAL awkward and not cute.")
Afterward, we were all in shock and in tears. As soon as I heard "stop", I crumbled into Despina's arms and cried my apologies onto her. Held her as she sobbed and wondered at my own ability to do this. How twisted am I that I was able to do say these horrible things? But the exercise taught me far more about how used to the abuse we must be if being the abuser is by far more disturbing than being the abused.
It took us well over an hour to get back into some semblance of normalcy. These are my fellow Riders, my friends, my comrades, my siblings. I realize it's going to be tough to see people saying these types of things to them during this Ride. Despina's face was in pieces, and I still hear Lindsey's heaves, and picture Jason's red-rimmed eyes because they all know the pain of this hatred. Saying this has anything to do with God or Jesus Christ's teachings is saddest of all. Horribly, horribly sad.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
An Explosion in My Ears
Last week I waited for a ring to come in the mail so that I could propose to my girlfriend on Valentine's day. Kind of cheesy, but she's like that and I love it. Three winter storms later my ring arrived the day after the proposed date and what could I do? I placed it on her finger in a stream of mutual tears anyway. Kris's 'yes' was barely audible as she wiped her face and embraced me. Not only do I want to spend the rest of my life with her because there is no one in this world that could make me smile like she does, but I wanted to let her know how much I love her, how much she means to me, and especially to show her that I appreciate her support as I get ready to go on the Equality Ride. I thought the timing was perfect anyway.
My mother who lives with us and knows my days are counted decided to give us a 'day off' and left for a couple of days. We cuddled on the couch and settled to watch a funny movie. As things go, at 11pm Kris received a phone call from her boss. They are very sorry, business is not as busy as they expected, they'll pay her through the week... Not-so perfect timing.
This is after we just finished emptying the boxes into our new apartment. After we took my mother in after a family emergency and after I gave my notice at work to leave. It's a few days before I go and now we scramble to figure out our finances, to see if something of the utmost importance needs to be left up to only people that can afford it.
Sighing with relief we figure if Kris doesn't eat out, if those energy-efficient lightbulbs really do save us some money, and with both of our tax money...she can give herself about two months to find another job (one that can pay the bills, of course). I'll be back by then as well and can begin to contribute. In this economy, that is being very positive and extremely hopeful (as people of faith should be, I say!).
So here I go... Thank you, my darling Kris. You have saved my behind yet again.
My mother who lives with us and knows my days are counted decided to give us a 'day off' and left for a couple of days. We cuddled on the couch and settled to watch a funny movie. As things go, at 11pm Kris received a phone call from her boss. They are very sorry, business is not as busy as they expected, they'll pay her through the week... Not-so perfect timing.
This is after we just finished emptying the boxes into our new apartment. After we took my mother in after a family emergency and after I gave my notice at work to leave. It's a few days before I go and now we scramble to figure out our finances, to see if something of the utmost importance needs to be left up to only people that can afford it.
Sighing with relief we figure if Kris doesn't eat out, if those energy-efficient lightbulbs really do save us some money, and with both of our tax money...she can give herself about two months to find another job (one that can pay the bills, of course). I'll be back by then as well and can begin to contribute. In this economy, that is being very positive and extremely hopeful (as people of faith should be, I say!).
So here I go... Thank you, my darling Kris. You have saved my behind yet again.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
The Simple Things by Chavela Vargas
Las Simples Cosas by Chavela Vargas
Uno se despide incensiblemente de pequeñas cosas
lo mismo que un arbol que en tiempo de otoño se queda sin hojas
al fin la tristeza es la muerte lenta de las simples cosas
esas cosas simples que quedan doliendo en el corazón
Uno vuelve siempre a los mismos sitios donde amo la vida
y entonces comprende como estan de ausentes las cosas queridas
por eso muchacha no partas ahora soñando el regreso
que el amor es simple y a las cosas simples las debora el tiempo
demorate a ti, en la luz solar de este medio dia
donde encontraras con el pan al sol la mesa tendida
por eso muchacha no partas ahora soñando el regreso
que el amor es simple y a las cosas simples las debora el tiempo
Uno vuelve siempre a los viejos sitios donde amo la vida...
One says goodbye
insensibly to small things
the same as a tree
that in the autumn will shed all its leaves
in the end, sadness is the slow death of simple things
those simple things that leave the heart aching.
One always returns to the same spaces where one loved life
and only then understands the absence of those loved things.
girl, that is why, you shouldn't part thinking of regressing
because love is simple and time devours simple things
take your time, in the midday sun's glow
where you will see the bread in the warmth of the sun and that the table is set.
girl, that is why, you shouldn't part...thinking of regressing
because love is simple and time devours simple things
One always returns to the same spaces where one loved life.
(translated by Sabrina Diz)
Uno se despide incensiblemente de pequeñas cosas
lo mismo que un arbol que en tiempo de otoño se queda sin hojas
al fin la tristeza es la muerte lenta de las simples cosas
esas cosas simples que quedan doliendo en el corazón
Uno vuelve siempre a los mismos sitios donde amo la vida
y entonces comprende como estan de ausentes las cosas queridas
por eso muchacha no partas ahora soñando el regreso
que el amor es simple y a las cosas simples las debora el tiempo
demorate a ti, en la luz solar de este medio dia
donde encontraras con el pan al sol la mesa tendida
por eso muchacha no partas ahora soñando el regreso
que el amor es simple y a las cosas simples las debora el tiempo
Uno vuelve siempre a los viejos sitios donde amo la vida...
One says goodbye
insensibly to small things
the same as a tree
that in the autumn will shed all its leaves
in the end, sadness is the slow death of simple things
those simple things that leave the heart aching.
One always returns to the same spaces where one loved life
and only then understands the absence of those loved things.
girl, that is why, you shouldn't part thinking of regressing
because love is simple and time devours simple things
take your time, in the midday sun's glow
where you will see the bread in the warmth of the sun and that the table is set.
girl, that is why, you shouldn't part...thinking of regressing
because love is simple and time devours simple things
One always returns to the same spaces where one loved life.
(translated by Sabrina Diz)
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
An Imaginary World
As soon as you open the Bible you have to begin using your imagination. It doesn't matter where you start. You can open it and thumb through it randomly or launch from the very first line.. "In the beginning, God created Heaven and Earth" (Genesis 1:1), but either way you have to start picturing a world vastly different than the one you live in to understand it. The basic questions, "why are we here?" and "where are we going?" have to do with worlds that are unlike the one we share currently.
If you're like me then you believe that the reason we are here is to love each other: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it. Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets" [Matt22:37-40]. And to answer the second question it is simply, "Heaven...hopefully!"
Both these answers require vigorous effort on behalf of our minds to create a world where Love reigns, and another world which is the fulfillment of that total Love.
When I think about the Christian schools that we will be visiting that preach strictly against gays, lesbians, bi/pansexuals, and transgender people I have the feeling that the way they imagine these two worlds are very different than how I do. For me in the ideal Earth, there is no dividing line that exists between people of different races, sexual orientation, gender, ability, class... Nothing that creates a gap between the Love of one person for another. In the second world called 'Heaven', it is quite the same except as spiritual beings we do not have to force ourselves to look past what we have been taught about our physical differences. Without bodies we are open to love everyone without the need to "unlearn" the hatred we've been taught.
You see, I cannot imagine a Heaven where genitalia matter much. So I cannot understand why it would matter so much to God down here. You know that prayer, the one Jesus spoke of..."Our Father, who art in heaven,hallowed be thy name.Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven..." (Matthew 6:10-14) well, it sounds to me like Jesus wanted Earth to be like Heaven. Now, I can be wrong on this (I'm no theologian), but that's just how I imagine the ideal world to be. Perfect peace and harmony, in love, truth, and justice until the day that we are freed from our physical bodies and come together in Heaven with God. So if genitalia and physical differences do not matter in Heaven, I cannot imagine why they would on earth.
And that leads me to another question that I do not see posed very often. Why would God feel that homosexuality is sinful? It's a simple question. Do we really believe that this is to preserve life on Earth? I mean, 1) queer people have always existed, 2) less than 10% of the population is queer and 3) the world is overpopulated as it is. I don't foresee the extinction of humankind due to lack of spawn any time soon. I know what some people would say, "I shouldn't question God's word"...but I think that's BS. It's a cop-out to the question. Other "don'ts" in the Bible include having sex with animals, child abuse, and rape. There are obvious reason why these are included in the Bible and I would not be looked at funny if I were to ask what they were. So what is the reason people believe God would ban homosexuality?
My view of the world that God wanted for humans is one of peace and love and happiness. This may be a stretch for some that have experienced pain, neglect, rejection, abuse, and abandonment. It makes me sad that people don't believe God would want this for us on the basis that it is not our current reality. God only creates good works. We, as humans, muddy it all up. God wants us to love each other, this is the most important commandment and yet we use other words to hate each other. This is not God's plan...it is our doing.
It seems to me that it is not only the interpretation of the Bible that people argue over, but that some people are greatly limited by how they view a world and cannot imagine a world ruled and founded by complete and utter Love.
If you're like me then you believe that the reason we are here is to love each other: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it. Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets" [Matt22:37-40]. And to answer the second question it is simply, "Heaven...hopefully!"
Both these answers require vigorous effort on behalf of our minds to create a world where Love reigns, and another world which is the fulfillment of that total Love.
When I think about the Christian schools that we will be visiting that preach strictly against gays, lesbians, bi/pansexuals, and transgender people I have the feeling that the way they imagine these two worlds are very different than how I do. For me in the ideal Earth, there is no dividing line that exists between people of different races, sexual orientation, gender, ability, class... Nothing that creates a gap between the Love of one person for another. In the second world called 'Heaven', it is quite the same except as spiritual beings we do not have to force ourselves to look past what we have been taught about our physical differences. Without bodies we are open to love everyone without the need to "unlearn" the hatred we've been taught.
You see, I cannot imagine a Heaven where genitalia matter much. So I cannot understand why it would matter so much to God down here. You know that prayer, the one Jesus spoke of..."Our Father, who art in heaven,hallowed be thy name.Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven..." (Matthew 6:10-14) well, it sounds to me like Jesus wanted Earth to be like Heaven. Now, I can be wrong on this (I'm no theologian), but that's just how I imagine the ideal world to be. Perfect peace and harmony, in love, truth, and justice until the day that we are freed from our physical bodies and come together in Heaven with God. So if genitalia and physical differences do not matter in Heaven, I cannot imagine why they would on earth.
And that leads me to another question that I do not see posed very often. Why would God feel that homosexuality is sinful? It's a simple question. Do we really believe that this is to preserve life on Earth? I mean, 1) queer people have always existed, 2) less than 10% of the population is queer and 3) the world is overpopulated as it is. I don't foresee the extinction of humankind due to lack of spawn any time soon. I know what some people would say, "I shouldn't question God's word"...but I think that's BS. It's a cop-out to the question. Other "don'ts" in the Bible include having sex with animals, child abuse, and rape. There are obvious reason why these are included in the Bible and I would not be looked at funny if I were to ask what they were. So what is the reason people believe God would ban homosexuality?
My view of the world that God wanted for humans is one of peace and love and happiness. This may be a stretch for some that have experienced pain, neglect, rejection, abuse, and abandonment. It makes me sad that people don't believe God would want this for us on the basis that it is not our current reality. God only creates good works. We, as humans, muddy it all up. God wants us to love each other, this is the most important commandment and yet we use other words to hate each other. This is not God's plan...it is our doing.
It seems to me that it is not only the interpretation of the Bible that people argue over, but that some people are greatly limited by how they view a world and cannot imagine a world ruled and founded by complete and utter Love.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Response to a Doubting Friend
Amanda, the Bible can be twisted and turned to be interpreted in all kinds of ways. Anything can be. Keep in mind what Jesus said (and this cannot be twisted): "FOR THERE ARE EUNUCHS THAT ARE BORN THAT WAY FROM THEIR MOTHERS WOMB; and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are also eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. HE WHO IS ABLE TO ACCEPT THIS, let him accept it." (Matt 19: 8-12). So the Eunuch that was born that way, would not that be homosexuals? This is pretty much the only thing that Jesus said (and Jesus IS God...let's not forget) about homosexuals...and never once did Jesus condemn anyone. And, Jesus knew there would be people that would not be able to accept this truth. This is clear!!! In black and white!!! What else did Jesus need to say for people to accept this? Did he need to wear a shirt saying: "I love Homos???"
So there are other parts in the Bible that talk about homosexuality, talk about eating pork, talk about killing in the name of God... We can go through the Bible and if we were to mimic the actions of its heroes we'd be put in jail and condemned as evil by the very same people that praise it and call it Holy. It all comes down to the fact that you have to choose to believe if God is a LOVING God, or if God is a capricious God. Would a loving God condemn homosexuals just because Ze felt like it? It's God we're talking about here! Why would Ze decide that everyone should be forgiven except a group of individuals that humans condemn because of who they LOVE. Isn't this the stain that cannot be washed from our history? Using holy texts against each other?
The Bible is a guide, written and breathed to life by God. But God promised, PROMISED us Free Will. And within that Free Will is not only the power of making decisions on what is right and wrong, but also the power of interpreting what is right and what is wrong for ourselves. This is of utmost importance! Without Free Will we would be puppets. Without it God would not be able to show us Hir's love for us! So, and this is my truest belief, if God gave us a Bible with a clear cut "Right and Wrong", our Free Will would be infringed. We would have no say in our lives. And this is the key...OUR LIFE. Our experience here on Earth, with one another. God left a lot up to us and we struggle with it because it is not supposed to be easy. Forgiveness would mean nothing if life was clear cut and easy. Forgiveness, Mercy, Grace, Love...these things would mean nothing. God's love would be a matter of rules to follow, of which we might as well kill ourselves should we defy. I choose to believe in a God that is beyond our understanding, more loving than we can ever imagine or sense or convey, more accepting and more inclusive than any of us (even Equality Riders!) will ever hope to be. ... See MoreI picture a perfect God. A PERFECT God.
Reference:
Matthew 19:8-12 (New International Version)
8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage[a]because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."
So there are other parts in the Bible that talk about homosexuality, talk about eating pork, talk about killing in the name of God... We can go through the Bible and if we were to mimic the actions of its heroes we'd be put in jail and condemned as evil by the very same people that praise it and call it Holy. It all comes down to the fact that you have to choose to believe if God is a LOVING God, or if God is a capricious God. Would a loving God condemn homosexuals just because Ze felt like it? It's God we're talking about here! Why would Ze decide that everyone should be forgiven except a group of individuals that humans condemn because of who they LOVE. Isn't this the stain that cannot be washed from our history? Using holy texts against each other?
The Bible is a guide, written and breathed to life by God. But God promised, PROMISED us Free Will. And within that Free Will is not only the power of making decisions on what is right and wrong, but also the power of interpreting what is right and what is wrong for ourselves. This is of utmost importance! Without Free Will we would be puppets. Without it God would not be able to show us Hir's love for us! So, and this is my truest belief, if God gave us a Bible with a clear cut "Right and Wrong", our Free Will would be infringed. We would have no say in our lives. And this is the key...OUR LIFE. Our experience here on Earth, with one another. God left a lot up to us and we struggle with it because it is not supposed to be easy. Forgiveness would mean nothing if life was clear cut and easy. Forgiveness, Mercy, Grace, Love...these things would mean nothing. God's love would be a matter of rules to follow, of which we might as well kill ourselves should we defy. I choose to believe in a God that is beyond our understanding, more loving than we can ever imagine or sense or convey, more accepting and more inclusive than any of us (even Equality Riders!) will ever hope to be. ... See MoreI picture a perfect God. A PERFECT God.
Reference:
Matthew 19:8-12 (New International Version)
8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage[a]because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Why am I on the Equality Ride?
The title is my answer.
I'm committed to the 2010 Soulforce Equality Ride because it saddens me that people use the Bible, any sacred text really, to discriminate, hate, oppress, marginalize, ostracize, and murder any other human being.
It makes me sad. It makes me sick and nauseous. It makes me angry.
Sometimes I picture myself crying at the feet of a crowd, begging for them to love me. If only that would move people to discard the lies they were raised to embrace and guard as truths...I would weep without pride, without restraint.
I will be blogging my journey here...please feel free to leave me little love notes...they will treasured along the way :)
I'm committed to the 2010 Soulforce Equality Ride because it saddens me that people use the Bible, any sacred text really, to discriminate, hate, oppress, marginalize, ostracize, and murder any other human being.
It makes me sad. It makes me sick and nauseous. It makes me angry.
Sometimes I picture myself crying at the feet of a crowd, begging for them to love me. If only that would move people to discard the lies they were raised to embrace and guard as truths...I would weep without pride, without restraint.
I will be blogging my journey here...please feel free to leave me little love notes...they will treasured along the way :)
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