Houghton College in Houghton, NY

Today was really the first welcoming school and so the first time we were able to get on campus and really get into dialogue with students and staff. It was stated from the beginning by the administration that "at the end of the day they would agree to disagree" but that the dialogue would be welcome. This was discouraging. Knowing that the administration was going into this conversation with a firm decision in mind (of not to change anything at all), to me, isn't dialogue. Dialogue for me is an exchange of ideas with an open mind to learn from the other person and keep yourself open to the possibilities.

While the administration kept up this facade of "dialogue" it didn't get me down one bit because the students were genuine. At first I was extremely anxious and nervous. After three cups of coffee I was worried I wouldn't be able to shake hands with anyone, either! However, it was really interesting.

Each one of us Riders had a "host". I'm assuming the host's job was to aid us in not getting lost around campus (ahem), guide conversation, and protect us as much as the students from any "inappropriateness" (what this would be, I'm not completely sure). I couldn't figure my host out at first. I didn't know if he was for or against me, what his role was exactly, or how much influence he would have over the other students that would come up to talk to me. Because I wasn't really sure what to expect I just started asking questions. Purposeful and intentional questions, but I didn't want to go into any type of shpeal. My first question was geared toward the policy at Houghton that warns against "homosexual activity" and so I asked, "What do you think is considered heterosexual behavior?"

I thought it was witty and serious at the same time. It was really important for me to establish a difference between my sexual orientation and my sexuality, or at least what I may or may not do while in bed with another individual. And I was surprised that the conversation stayed at a serious level all the while being open, honest, respectful, and absolutely affirming. It was GREAT! It was my discovery that while the school administrators were not open to the possibility of change, the students thought quite differently. Perhaps things haven't progressed on this campus is because these conversations weren't happening before we arrived, and in the past few months the school has teethed with sexuality conversations in preparation of our arrival. It is my hope that the students will take over from here and continue these conversations. It is in their hands, and I feel confident that the matter won't be easily dropped, and LGBTQ students on campus no longer ignored. That is me thinking positively, of course, and only time will tell...