Webpage: http://www.mdcbowen.org/p2/rm/mcintosh1.html
Most white, middle-class citizens see society from a monocultural perspective, a perspective that assumes, often unconsciously, that persons of all races are in the same cultural system together. This single-system form of seeing the world, is blind to its own cultural specificity. People who see persons of other races monoculturally cannot imagine the reality that those "others" think of themselves not in relation to the majority race but in terms of their own culturally specific identities. This paper presents an "interactive phase theory" with regard to race that is intended to reassess school curricula in terms of heightened levels of consciousness concerning race.
ON THE INVISIBILITY OF PRIVILEGE
from Dr. Peggy McIntosh, Wellesley College Center for Research on Women... "I had been taught about racism as something which puts others at a disadvantage, but had been taught not to see one of its corollary aspects, white privilege... "I have come to see white privilege as an invisible package of unearned assets which I can count on cashing in each day, but about which I was 'meant' to remain oblivious. White privilege is like an invisible weightless knapsack of special provisions, assurances, tools, maps, guides, code books, passports, visas, clothes, compass, emergency gear and blank checks. "Whites are taught to think of their lives as morally neutral, formative and average, and also ideal, so that when we work to benefit others, this is seen as work which will allow 'them' to be more like 'us.'" Dr. McIntosh has named some of the ways of white privilege:
1. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my race most of the time.
2. I can avoid spending time with people whom I was trained to mistrust and who have learned to mistrust my kind or me.
3. If I should need to move, I can be pretty sure of renting or purchasing housing in an area which I can afford and in which I would want to live.
4. I can be pretty sure that my neighbors in such a location will be neutral or pleasant to me.
5. I can go shopping alone most of the time, pretty well assured that I will not be followed or harassed.
6. I can turn on the television or open to the front page of the paper and see people of my race widely represented.
7. When I am told about our national heritage or about "civilization," I am shown that people of my color made it what it is.
8. I can be sure that my children will be given curricular materials that testify to the existence of their race.
9. If I want to, I can be pretty sure of finding a publisher for this piece on white privilege.
10. I can be pretty sure of having my voice heard in a group in which I am the only member of my race.
11. I can be casual about whether or not to listen to another person's voice in a group in which s/he is the only member of his/her race.
12. I can go into a music shop and count on finding the music of my race represented, into a supermarket and find the staple foods which fit with my cultural traditions, into a hairdresser's shop and find someone who can cut my hair.
13. Whether I use checks, credit cards or cash, I can count on my skin color not to work against the appearance of financial reliability.
14. I can arrange to protect my children most of the time from people who might not like them.
15. I do not have to educate my children to be aware of systemic racism for their own daily physical protection.
16. I can be pretty sure that my children's teachers and employers will tolerate them if they fit school and workplace norms; my chief worries about them do not concern others' attitudes toward their race.
17. I can talk with my mouth full and not have people put this down to my color.
18. I can swear, or dress in second hand clothes, or not answer letters, without having people attribute these choices to the bad morals, the poverty or the illiteracy of my race.
19. I can speak in public to a powerful male group without putting my race on trial.
20. I can do well in a challenging situation without being called a credit to my race.
21. I am never asked to speak for all the people of my racial group.
22. I can remain oblivious of the language and customs of persons of color who constitute the world's majority without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
23. I can criticize our government and talk about how much I fear its policies and behavior without being seen as a cultural outsider.
24. I can be pretty sure that if I ask to talk to the "person in charge", I will be facing a person of my race.
25. If a traffic cop pulls me over or if the IRS audits my tax return, I can be sure I haven't been singled out because of my race.
26. I can easily buy posters, post-cards, picture books, greeting cards, dolls, toys and children's magazines featuring people of my race.
27. I can go home from most meetings of organizations I belong to feeling somewhat tied in, rather than isolated, out-of-place, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance or feared.
28. I can be pretty sure that an argument with a colleague of another race is more likely to jeopardize her/his chances for advancement than to jeopardize mine.
29. I can be pretty sure that if I argue for the promotion of a person of another race, or a program centering on race, this is not likely to cost me heavily within my prsent setting, eben if my colleagues disagree with me.
30. If I declare there is a racial issue at hand, or there isn't a racial issue at hand, my race will lend me more credibility for either position than a person of color will have.
31. I can choose to ignore developments in minority writing and minority activist programs, or disparage them, or learn from them, but in any case, I can find ways to be more or less protected from negative consequences of any of these choices.
32. My culture gives me little fear about ignoring the perspectives and powers of people of other races.
33. I am not made acutely aware that my shape, bearing or body odor will be taken as a reflection on my race.
34. I can worry about racism without being seen as self-interested or self-seeking.
35. I can take a job with an affirmative action employer without having my co-workers on the job suspect that I got it because of my race.
36. If my day, week or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether it had racial overtones.
37. I can be pretty sure of finding people who would be willing to talk with me and advise me about my next steps, professionally.
38. I can think over many options, social, political, imaginative or professional, without asking whether a person of my race would be accepted or allowed to do what I want to do.
39. I can be late to a meeting without having the lateness reflect on my race.
40. I can choose public accommodation without fearing that people of my race cannot get in or will be mistreated in the places I have chosen.
41. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help, my race will not work against me.
42. I can arrange my activities so that I will never have to experience feelings of rejection owing to my race.
43. If I have low credibility as a leader I can be sure that my race is not the problem.
44. I can easily find academic courses and institutions which give attention only to people of my race.
45. I can expect figurative language and imagery in all of the arts to testify to experiences of my race.
46. I can choose blemish cover or bandages in "flesh" color and have them more or less match my skin.
47. I can travel alone or with my spouse without expecting embarrassment or hostility in those who deal with us.
48. I have no difficulty finding neighborhoods where people approve of our household.
49. My children are given texts and classes which implicitly support our kind of family unit and do not turn them against my choice of domestic partnership.
50. I will feel welcomed and "normal" in the usual walks of public life, institutional and social.
"Having described this, what will we each do to lessen this imbalance of power and privilege? Will we choose to use our arbitrarily-awarded power to try to re-construct power systems?'
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Southwest Baptist University
It might be safe to say that the Riders as a whole, walked away from Southwest Baptist University disturbed and sick to our stomachs. I first have to apologize for anything offensive I may say, but after 13 schools where I have endured racism, sexism, homophobia, masogynism, classism, ageism, and different oppressions I am tired of having patience. SBU, while not the worst school in terms of welcome and friendliness, for me were absolutely clueless in regards to systems of oppression, racism, sexism...I can go on.
Where do I begin?
We arrived at the school about 10 minutes early and as we were getting off the bus students, faculty, staff, and administrators began pouring out of the front doors to greet us. It immediately put a smile on my face. BSU was Amanda's stop and in my heart I wanted everything to go so well, knowing she had worked very hard along with the school to schedule the day. As I shook hands and introduced myself to a group of smiling faces, my host for the day, Revecca, found me and Jennifer Luu. Not all schools feel the need to pair the Riders up with student or faculty "hosts", but there have been a few schools that do that. I don't mind. Sometimes it really works out, like it did for me yesterday. I thought Revecca, a staff member in the Physical Therapy department, was smart and friendly a wonderful listener and I greatly enjoyed her company. It always takes me a moment to try to gauge who I'm paired with because schools have done some devious things, like tell their hosts not to bother to engage in debate with us because we are so well "trained" that it would be futile. Yeah, just some really dumb things that hurt any type of relationship even before it begins. Jennifer and I chatted with Revecca for a while, explained Preferred Pronoun Preferences, talked about past campus visits, and discussed the intersections of oppression...all before lunch!
We talked a little bit with faculty and administrators and had coffee and then we all walked to chapel. I really believe that's where all problems began. The service was atrocious. Apparently there was a guest speaker and none of the administrators wanted to take responsibility for the awful things this person said, instead passing the buck or shirking responsibility. I'll paint a picture. As soon as I walked into this huge auditorium there was metal christian rock playing. I was happily surprised. It was lively and fun. We settled down. I sat near Amanda and other fellow Riders and took a moment away from my amazing host to enjoy service. Then a band came on and started singing and playing music. While it was nice I was painfully aware of the lack of representation of people of color. Nothing ethnic whatsoever except for a very offensive shout out of something like "let's begin the Natives are getting restless". It only got worse. A picture of Black babies came on the huge flatscreens and a speaker came out to give a sermon (lecture?). He talked about how he had just come from (Sudan?) and saw how little girls as young as age 8 were exploited, and went into great detail about how often they were used in an hour and daily...and then in the next sentence called that same exploited child a "whore". I almost vomited. Then the very next moment he was saying that people do worse things than that in their heads. What? I was so offended and disgusted and still couldn't understand why there were pictures of Black children on the screen and a White speaker that obviously had no idea what he was talking about (and from comments from the students later that day, they had no idea what he was talking about either). Another huge problem we saw was the "sermon's" emphasis on missionary work. The speaker (sorry I can't remember the name) said that the decision wasn't about whether to go, but whether you should stay. And as I spoke to more people and realized their absolute lack of understanding of other races/ethnicities and cultures...and given missionary works' legacy of cultural genocide and destruction of whole peoples...throwing these kids into this type of work without any type of sensitivity training (what's that?) was disturbing to us. I wanted to get out of there. And I like missionary work! I think it's a great idea to get involved in your world. But not the way SBU is doing it. Not with kids that at 19 and 20 years old are asking questions like, "well, isn't White a color too?" After the awful speech/sermon there was more music full of sexist and ableist offensive language. There was a "boys'" part followed by a "girl's" part and the lyrics were all about "standing for God". Clearly, they don't think about their students who may have trouble with this wording. As one of our Riders uses a wheelchair, they have helped us become more aware of the language we use. I try to tell myself that the school allowing us on campus was a big step in the right direction, but I'm not sure. They are absolutely clueless about how to overcome any type of oppression in their own school although they have been in business for 132 years.
Between chapel and lunch we stopped at the "quad" by the fountain and talked with students. I was approached by a really wonderful young man and his friend and although I am going to respect our conversation, I at least want to commend this person for opening their heart and trusting me with some very confidential information about his past and opening himself up through dialogue to reveal his pain about the racism that permeates SBU. Frankly, I was pissed off when he said that people "look away" when he passes by and then he shared his pessimism that the school could ever change. It saddened my heart and told him that we were here to talk about all forms of oppression and discrimination and that even though he couldn't make it to the panel (the only event opened to all students) I would make sure to speak up for him.
We moved on to lunch after that. Round tables with 6 or 7 people and some really great food. I was hoping to begin engaging in some real dialogue about LGBTQ issues at my table, but I just so happened to sit with Kurt, the Chapel Director, and DJ (bless her heart) blurted out "Who let that guy speak?" And so ensued a conversation about racism and missionary work in which the Dean of Students, the Chapel Director, a Student Representative, Revecca, and four Riders all had much to say. I didn't hold back. I was hurt from the awful chapel service where I was offended from the pulpit as a woman and as a person who admires missionary work, as a person of color that was not represented, and as a person that work against this narrow-minded view of the world. Kurt's response was "we have minorities preach, don't judge on what you see in only one day"...and I lost it. I said, "there is NO excuse or reason why people of color should not be in everything you do ALL the time. It is not about us being included by White people, but about being an integral part of everything that is happening in this world." (None of that verbatim, I was pissed off and I was so appalled at what this supposed Leader was saying, how clueless he was, how blatant the racism...there was no way I could stay quiet. Another racist and stupid remark: "We want people of color to participate but they just aren't interested." WTF? If I walk into chapel and it is heavy metal or ska punk, and the band and singers are White, what they sing and how they sing it does not represent my culture or how I grew up whatsoever, and people from the pulpit are saying some ignorant, racist remarks while displaying Black kids' faces for sympathy... WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THAT? Most of the diversity population (6%) are there for athletics. So what I gathered is that they take in "minority" kids on athletic scholarships to claim diversity, preying on the fact that most of these kids need it so that they can get a degree, taylor events and activities specifically around White culture or standards, and then BLAME these students because they are not interested in going through more ostracism and mental harm. One of the seniors at our table asked so many good questions, making himself vulnerable, but at the same time...HE'S A SENIOR! Like, about to graduate, and go off into the world and asked questions like: "Isn't White a color?" Had no idea what "White Privilege" was, nor the hint of understanding systems of oppression. This while the Dean of Students and the Chapel Director also could not explain, and were using offensive language as well!
It was a really long day. After that six of our Riders joined a panel discussion with 6 SBU students and faculty. It was awful, too. While Jess, one of our Riders who is a queer woman of color, spoke during the panel another Rider, Jason, sat in front of a Psychology Professor and heard all kinds of derogatory comments about her. And one of the panelists, a professor actually said something like: "The way I love you I call it love and you call it oppression, it's sad." Four of us from the audience yelled back, “YES, it IS sad!” So, kick us out of your schools, out of your communities, out of your families...because that's what you think love is, nevermind how it was that Jesus would love people.
At the end of the day some of us were ashamed of calling ourselves Christians. Personally, as someone that has just found Jesus three years ago and am still growing in my faith I lost my excitement for the first time. I question what Christians believe love is and if that aligns with my vision of love. And how can it be possible that I am capable of loving my friends greater than what God is capable of? How is it that I can love them and find them beautiful and God cannot? I remind myself that God sent Jesus as the ultimate example, and to not look to the different kinds of Christianity or Christians to follow. I try to remind myself. Sometimes the fences and divisions that we encounter along the way make it really difficult for me to believe that God wanted that. Pentecostal, Protestant, Mormon, Quakers, Baptist, whatever. They claim to be more right than others. And then Christianity claims to be more right than Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, etc. I throw my hands in the air and just pray. Pray that God knows we are simple and just need to be loved. And that being loved is not as complicated as we want to make it.
Where do I begin?
We arrived at the school about 10 minutes early and as we were getting off the bus students, faculty, staff, and administrators began pouring out of the front doors to greet us. It immediately put a smile on my face. BSU was Amanda's stop and in my heart I wanted everything to go so well, knowing she had worked very hard along with the school to schedule the day. As I shook hands and introduced myself to a group of smiling faces, my host for the day, Revecca, found me and Jennifer Luu. Not all schools feel the need to pair the Riders up with student or faculty "hosts", but there have been a few schools that do that. I don't mind. Sometimes it really works out, like it did for me yesterday. I thought Revecca, a staff member in the Physical Therapy department, was smart and friendly a wonderful listener and I greatly enjoyed her company. It always takes me a moment to try to gauge who I'm paired with because schools have done some devious things, like tell their hosts not to bother to engage in debate with us because we are so well "trained" that it would be futile. Yeah, just some really dumb things that hurt any type of relationship even before it begins. Jennifer and I chatted with Revecca for a while, explained Preferred Pronoun Preferences, talked about past campus visits, and discussed the intersections of oppression...all before lunch!
We talked a little bit with faculty and administrators and had coffee and then we all walked to chapel. I really believe that's where all problems began. The service was atrocious. Apparently there was a guest speaker and none of the administrators wanted to take responsibility for the awful things this person said, instead passing the buck or shirking responsibility. I'll paint a picture. As soon as I walked into this huge auditorium there was metal christian rock playing. I was happily surprised. It was lively and fun. We settled down. I sat near Amanda and other fellow Riders and took a moment away from my amazing host to enjoy service. Then a band came on and started singing and playing music. While it was nice I was painfully aware of the lack of representation of people of color. Nothing ethnic whatsoever except for a very offensive shout out of something like "let's begin the Natives are getting restless". It only got worse. A picture of Black babies came on the huge flatscreens and a speaker came out to give a sermon (lecture?). He talked about how he had just come from (Sudan?) and saw how little girls as young as age 8 were exploited, and went into great detail about how often they were used in an hour and daily...and then in the next sentence called that same exploited child a "whore". I almost vomited. Then the very next moment he was saying that people do worse things than that in their heads. What? I was so offended and disgusted and still couldn't understand why there were pictures of Black children on the screen and a White speaker that obviously had no idea what he was talking about (and from comments from the students later that day, they had no idea what he was talking about either). Another huge problem we saw was the "sermon's" emphasis on missionary work. The speaker (sorry I can't remember the name) said that the decision wasn't about whether to go, but whether you should stay. And as I spoke to more people and realized their absolute lack of understanding of other races/ethnicities and cultures...and given missionary works' legacy of cultural genocide and destruction of whole peoples...throwing these kids into this type of work without any type of sensitivity training (what's that?) was disturbing to us. I wanted to get out of there. And I like missionary work! I think it's a great idea to get involved in your world. But not the way SBU is doing it. Not with kids that at 19 and 20 years old are asking questions like, "well, isn't White a color too?" After the awful speech/sermon there was more music full of sexist and ableist offensive language. There was a "boys'" part followed by a "girl's" part and the lyrics were all about "standing for God". Clearly, they don't think about their students who may have trouble with this wording. As one of our Riders uses a wheelchair, they have helped us become more aware of the language we use. I try to tell myself that the school allowing us on campus was a big step in the right direction, but I'm not sure. They are absolutely clueless about how to overcome any type of oppression in their own school although they have been in business for 132 years.
Between chapel and lunch we stopped at the "quad" by the fountain and talked with students. I was approached by a really wonderful young man and his friend and although I am going to respect our conversation, I at least want to commend this person for opening their heart and trusting me with some very confidential information about his past and opening himself up through dialogue to reveal his pain about the racism that permeates SBU. Frankly, I was pissed off when he said that people "look away" when he passes by and then he shared his pessimism that the school could ever change. It saddened my heart and told him that we were here to talk about all forms of oppression and discrimination and that even though he couldn't make it to the panel (the only event opened to all students) I would make sure to speak up for him.
We moved on to lunch after that. Round tables with 6 or 7 people and some really great food. I was hoping to begin engaging in some real dialogue about LGBTQ issues at my table, but I just so happened to sit with Kurt, the Chapel Director, and DJ (bless her heart) blurted out "Who let that guy speak?" And so ensued a conversation about racism and missionary work in which the Dean of Students, the Chapel Director, a Student Representative, Revecca, and four Riders all had much to say. I didn't hold back. I was hurt from the awful chapel service where I was offended from the pulpit as a woman and as a person who admires missionary work, as a person of color that was not represented, and as a person that work against this narrow-minded view of the world. Kurt's response was "we have minorities preach, don't judge on what you see in only one day"...and I lost it. I said, "there is NO excuse or reason why people of color should not be in everything you do ALL the time. It is not about us being included by White people, but about being an integral part of everything that is happening in this world." (None of that verbatim, I was pissed off and I was so appalled at what this supposed Leader was saying, how clueless he was, how blatant the racism...there was no way I could stay quiet. Another racist and stupid remark: "We want people of color to participate but they just aren't interested." WTF? If I walk into chapel and it is heavy metal or ska punk, and the band and singers are White, what they sing and how they sing it does not represent my culture or how I grew up whatsoever, and people from the pulpit are saying some ignorant, racist remarks while displaying Black kids' faces for sympathy... WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THAT? Most of the diversity population (6%) are there for athletics. So what I gathered is that they take in "minority" kids on athletic scholarships to claim diversity, preying on the fact that most of these kids need it so that they can get a degree, taylor events and activities specifically around White culture or standards, and then BLAME these students because they are not interested in going through more ostracism and mental harm. One of the seniors at our table asked so many good questions, making himself vulnerable, but at the same time...HE'S A SENIOR! Like, about to graduate, and go off into the world and asked questions like: "Isn't White a color?" Had no idea what "White Privilege" was, nor the hint of understanding systems of oppression. This while the Dean of Students and the Chapel Director also could not explain, and were using offensive language as well!
It was a really long day. After that six of our Riders joined a panel discussion with 6 SBU students and faculty. It was awful, too. While Jess, one of our Riders who is a queer woman of color, spoke during the panel another Rider, Jason, sat in front of a Psychology Professor and heard all kinds of derogatory comments about her. And one of the panelists, a professor actually said something like: "The way I love you I call it love and you call it oppression, it's sad." Four of us from the audience yelled back, “YES, it IS sad!” So, kick us out of your schools, out of your communities, out of your families...because that's what you think love is, nevermind how it was that Jesus would love people.
At the end of the day some of us were ashamed of calling ourselves Christians. Personally, as someone that has just found Jesus three years ago and am still growing in my faith I lost my excitement for the first time. I question what Christians believe love is and if that aligns with my vision of love. And how can it be possible that I am capable of loving my friends greater than what God is capable of? How is it that I can love them and find them beautiful and God cannot? I remind myself that God sent Jesus as the ultimate example, and to not look to the different kinds of Christianity or Christians to follow. I try to remind myself. Sometimes the fences and divisions that we encounter along the way make it really difficult for me to believe that God wanted that. Pentecostal, Protestant, Mormon, Quakers, Baptist, whatever. They claim to be more right than others. And then Christianity claims to be more right than Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, etc. I throw my hands in the air and just pray. Pray that God knows we are simple and just need to be loved. And that being loved is not as complicated as we want to make it.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Letter from Shaunita @ Bethune Cookman University in Daytona, FL
Hi! I read about the Baylor experience on your blog-OMG! I am glad that it ended better than it started, referring to the evening event that you all
had together. I am really sorry about that. It makes me go :WTH?! What
more does it take? How much struggle and pain has to continue before we have real rights in this world for everyone?
About the person you mentioned in your blog who wanted to know the
difference between a sexual act and a same sex friendship- I may have that
same question in a sense. I asked some of my friends onTrevorSpace-what
makes a person gay? Several of them told me that you have to have sex with
someone of the same sex/be sexual with them or have some sort of sexual
attraction to call yourself a member of the gay community. I was a little
shocked that they would say this. And I disagree. I havent been with a
woman before but all my life I have questioned what I am. I have been and
am attracted to women and men. I have only been with men but I have not
considered myself fully straight. I always look at those questionaire
boxes with unease. I was never sure whether to put a title or anything on
myself because of the stigmas from family, friends and society,etc. I
subconsciously and secretly considered myself bisexual. I was confused
about my sexual orientation for a long time because I wasnot sure if I had
to DO something first. But I always thought about it. I always wondered. I
have always questioned myself and my sexuality. I understand of course
that it doesnt take sex for a person to know they are LGBTQ.
When you guys came to campus I was so excited! I felt free being with you
guys. I felt free from the traps of what people say or think or how people
put you in labels;even how we put labels on ourselves. I feel wonderful
inside. I want to express it more. Talking with you, I didnt (and dont)
feel like a sexual/racial anomaly. I walked away from our conversation
feeling like a better person and saying to myself-I AM gay;I AM bisexual.
And I felt great with that. I feel better about myself. I feel more
comfortable with who I am because I remembered that there are others out
here -there is you and everybody with Soulforce.
Going to BCU there is no outlet to express who you are.You get away from
that whole experience of what I described above. Being in Daytona I dont
see alot of avenues to do this. Back home (Seattle) as I mentioned before
there are so many organizations, clubs and groups-I felt relieved when I
talked to you because it was almost like that part of me had been on ice
or reserve or shut away/subconsciously forgotten in order to cope.
I am unsure whether you all made an impact here at BCU. I seem to be the
only person talking about you guys being here. Not many people knew you
all were here and not many seemed to care enough to stop by the table or
to see what you all were saying. I am embarassed by my campus:( A lot of
people donot seem to care about anything but themselves on this
campus-they just want to make it out of this school or hang out. I dont
know many activist like spirits here and it saddens me.
> > Shaunita De'Juanette Felder
> >
> >
> >
> > "I wish to live because life has within it that which is good, that which
> > is beautiful and that which is love.
> > Therefore, since I have known all of these things, I have found them to be
> > reason enough and-I wish to live.
> > Moreover, because this is so, I wish others to live for generations and
> > generations and generations."
> > -Lorraine Hansberry
> >
> >
> > "Freedom cannot be given; freedom is something that comes into being when
> > you do not seek it; it comes into being only when you know you are a
> > prisoner, when you know for yourself completely the state of being
> > conditioned, when you know you are held by society, by culture, by
> > tradition, held by whatever you have been told. Freedom is order - it is
> > never disorder - and one must have freedom, completely, both outwardly and
> > inwardly; without freedom there is no clarity; without freedom you can't
> > love; without freedom you can't find truth; without freedom you can't go
> > beyond the limitation of the mind. You must demand it with all your being.
> > When you so demand it, you will find out for yourself what order is - and
> > order is not the following of a pattern, a design; it is not the outcome
> > of habit".
> >
> > - J. Krishnamurti, Bombay, India, January 1968 Collected Works. Vol. VIII
***Permission was attained to use her full name and school.
had together. I am really sorry about that. It makes me go :WTH?! What
more does it take? How much struggle and pain has to continue before we have real rights in this world for everyone?
About the person you mentioned in your blog who wanted to know the
difference between a sexual act and a same sex friendship- I may have that
same question in a sense. I asked some of my friends onTrevorSpace-what
makes a person gay? Several of them told me that you have to have sex with
someone of the same sex/be sexual with them or have some sort of sexual
attraction to call yourself a member of the gay community. I was a little
shocked that they would say this. And I disagree. I havent been with a
woman before but all my life I have questioned what I am. I have been and
am attracted to women and men. I have only been with men but I have not
considered myself fully straight. I always look at those questionaire
boxes with unease. I was never sure whether to put a title or anything on
myself because of the stigmas from family, friends and society,etc. I
subconsciously and secretly considered myself bisexual. I was confused
about my sexual orientation for a long time because I wasnot sure if I had
to DO something first. But I always thought about it. I always wondered. I
have always questioned myself and my sexuality. I understand of course
that it doesnt take sex for a person to know they are LGBTQ.
When you guys came to campus I was so excited! I felt free being with you
guys. I felt free from the traps of what people say or think or how people
put you in labels;even how we put labels on ourselves. I feel wonderful
inside. I want to express it more. Talking with you, I didnt (and dont)
feel like a sexual/racial anomaly. I walked away from our conversation
feeling like a better person and saying to myself-I AM gay;I AM bisexual.
And I felt great with that. I feel better about myself. I feel more
comfortable with who I am because I remembered that there are others out
here -there is you and everybody with Soulforce.
Going to BCU there is no outlet to express who you are.You get away from
that whole experience of what I described above. Being in Daytona I dont
see alot of avenues to do this. Back home (Seattle) as I mentioned before
there are so many organizations, clubs and groups-I felt relieved when I
talked to you because it was almost like that part of me had been on ice
or reserve or shut away/subconsciously forgotten in order to cope.
I am unsure whether you all made an impact here at BCU. I seem to be the
only person talking about you guys being here. Not many people knew you
all were here and not many seemed to care enough to stop by the table or
to see what you all were saying. I am embarassed by my campus:( A lot of
people donot seem to care about anything but themselves on this
campus-they just want to make it out of this school or hang out. I dont
know many activist like spirits here and it saddens me.
> > Shaunita De'Juanette Felder
> >
> >
> >
> > "I wish to live because life has within it that which is good, that which
> > is beautiful and that which is love.
> > Therefore, since I have known all of these things, I have found them to be
> > reason enough and-I wish to live.
> > Moreover, because this is so, I wish others to live for generations and
> > generations and generations."
> > -Lorraine Hansberry
> >
> >
> > "Freedom cannot be given; freedom is something that comes into being when
> > you do not seek it; it comes into being only when you know you are a
> > prisoner, when you know for yourself completely the state of being
> > conditioned, when you know you are held by society, by culture, by
> > tradition, held by whatever you have been told. Freedom is order - it is
> > never disorder - and one must have freedom, completely, both outwardly and
> > inwardly; without freedom there is no clarity; without freedom you can't
> > love; without freedom you can't find truth; without freedom you can't go
> > beyond the limitation of the mind. You must demand it with all your being.
> > When you so demand it, you will find out for yourself what order is - and
> > order is not the following of a pattern, a design; it is not the outcome
> > of habit".
> >
> > - J. Krishnamurti, Bombay, India, January 1968 Collected Works. Vol. VIII
***Permission was attained to use her full name and school.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Baylor University in Waco, Texas
Today we visited the much anticipated Baylor University. Two years ago when Soulforce visited the campus they chalked in front of the chapel and were asked to stop. All but five Riders and one student stopped at which point the ones that continued were arrested on trespassing charges. Yes, I said “chalked” which is the same as writing on sidewalk and streets with chalk. When they were taken to jail they were cavity searched, kept overnight before pretrial even though they were arrested mid-day, and a Trans Rider was mistreated he was placed in a female cell. All this, may I repeat, for chalking on sidewalk.
Mia and Jaxon, the Stop Planners for the school, coordinated a different approach this year and negotiated with administrator’s permission on campus to speak to students, faculty, and staff. So at 9am we walked onto campus excited to engage in dialogue and common ground. Nick and I volunteered to join in on a Philosophy class led by Dr. Dougherty who was the only Professor on campus to facilitate any kind of discussion or incorporate our visit into a class. This, I am sure, had a lot to do with the fact that Baylor did not send any type of e-mail announcing our visit and kept it very silent up until a day or two ago that they sent an e-mail that could be considered condescending (at best) by many. Kudos to Prof. Dougherty who I feel had the best intentions. It was disappointing that the dialogue that this opportunity fostered was greatly hindered by time constraints and an administrator that sat in on the conversation. However, the questions posed by Dr. Dougherty were insightful and the responses to the questions we posed back at him were honestly answered.
The rest of the day Riders spent engaging students and challenging them to think about the policy, how this policy aligns/contradicts Christian teachings, the intersection of justice and faith and sexuality, and just asking and answering questions. Personally, I had some really great discussions. During one of these with a student I tried to explain the difference between a sexual act and an identity. A question posed to me that I had not been asked before was, “If a lesbian couple does not engage in sexual activity, how is this different than two female friends?” I must admit it took me by surprise because it was so obvious to me, but I had to take a step back and admire this person for being courageous enough to admit ignorance and willing to be vulnerable by asking an honest question. These are the kinds of questions that students want to know; the kind of questions that could be answered within the safe spaces of a Queer/Straight Alliance if Baylor would allow one to exist.
Promptly at four o’clock, in accordance with our agreement, we boarded the bus and left campus. We rolled to a nearby park where Jaxon and Mia had planned a Variety Show. Under a pavilion with the sun shining down on us people shared a part of their lives with a friendly and eager audience. We had a little bit of everything. The show included spoken word, dance routines, slam poetry, queer skits, original music, and amazing ‘coming out’ testimonies that had the crowd in thunderous applause. In my own Equality Ride experience and after such a depleting day, this reminder of the wonderful and amazing community and culture I belong to, affirmed and replenished my belief in my faith, my cause, and my friends.
Mia and Jaxon, the Stop Planners for the school, coordinated a different approach this year and negotiated with administrator’s permission on campus to speak to students, faculty, and staff. So at 9am we walked onto campus excited to engage in dialogue and common ground. Nick and I volunteered to join in on a Philosophy class led by Dr. Dougherty who was the only Professor on campus to facilitate any kind of discussion or incorporate our visit into a class. This, I am sure, had a lot to do with the fact that Baylor did not send any type of e-mail announcing our visit and kept it very silent up until a day or two ago that they sent an e-mail that could be considered condescending (at best) by many. Kudos to Prof. Dougherty who I feel had the best intentions. It was disappointing that the dialogue that this opportunity fostered was greatly hindered by time constraints and an administrator that sat in on the conversation. However, the questions posed by Dr. Dougherty were insightful and the responses to the questions we posed back at him were honestly answered.
The rest of the day Riders spent engaging students and challenging them to think about the policy, how this policy aligns/contradicts Christian teachings, the intersection of justice and faith and sexuality, and just asking and answering questions. Personally, I had some really great discussions. During one of these with a student I tried to explain the difference between a sexual act and an identity. A question posed to me that I had not been asked before was, “If a lesbian couple does not engage in sexual activity, how is this different than two female friends?” I must admit it took me by surprise because it was so obvious to me, but I had to take a step back and admire this person for being courageous enough to admit ignorance and willing to be vulnerable by asking an honest question. These are the kinds of questions that students want to know; the kind of questions that could be answered within the safe spaces of a Queer/Straight Alliance if Baylor would allow one to exist.
Promptly at four o’clock, in accordance with our agreement, we boarded the bus and left campus. We rolled to a nearby park where Jaxon and Mia had planned a Variety Show. Under a pavilion with the sun shining down on us people shared a part of their lives with a friendly and eager audience. We had a little bit of everything. The show included spoken word, dance routines, slam poetry, queer skits, original music, and amazing ‘coming out’ testimonies that had the crowd in thunderous applause. In my own Equality Ride experience and after such a depleting day, this reminder of the wonderful and amazing community and culture I belong to, affirmed and replenished my belief in my faith, my cause, and my friends.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Response to Malone Student
Dear Student,
First I’d like to thank you for contacting me because I know that it takes a lot of courage and strength to speak your mind. No, I have not received many letters in opposition to our visit. None, actually. In my opinion, your comments and questions are directed in a Christ-like manner and this type of dialogue is what the Equality Ride is all about. Your letter poses some wonderful questions that get right to the heart of why we, 25 activists, leave our families and loved ones and go around the country for two months to visit colleges and universities. I hope to do your letter justice by answering below; however, it would be ideal if you can meet up with us any of the three days we will be in Canton, OH as I am sure the answers I give will open up more questions and comments!
Before I go on, I’d like to clear something up. While it is true that homophobia is successfully spread by religion and maintained by the church, not all the Riders feel oppressed by the Christian faith. Personally, I go to an affirming church and am happy to say I am Christian and queer :)
You inquire why we are visiting your campus, and especially since all types of public displays of affection are discouraged. My answer is simply that there are students on your campus that are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer and have not broken the covenant of celibacy, and might be perfectly happy to not engage in PDA. You see, our society has made “homosexuality” such a taboo that people find it very difficult to separate the Identity with the sexual act. If you don’t know any queer people, don’t learn or talk about it in school or at home, and all the information you receive about queer folks is linked to sex or sexual behavior, of course, that’s all you’re going to think about when the topic comes up. However, these students have a need to talk about their feelings, their experiences, their fears. Just as every other student on campus feels safe enough to ask questions, the Equality Ride is going to Malone in hopes that we can open up safe spaces for LGBTQ students to talk and ask questions too, without feeling like they are wrong for it, and feel safe about doing so. These questions range from what should I wear on my first date, to how do I tell my parents and faith community? What does the Bible say? What are these things I feel inside? I’m not attracted to the opposite gender, what does that mean? Students right now are suffering in an imposed silence.
Your second question, summed up, asks: People enter Malone fully aware of its rules, why would Soulforce choose to protest at a school where students have signed an agreement to participate to Malone’s standards? I have to admit, we get this all the time. There is a simple answer is that Malone is a fine institution with a rich and wonderful history and faith. Students that go to Malone have chosen to do so based on this and the programs offered there. It is not my understanding that the Quaker/Evangelical Friends have a tradition of excluding people, and so if a prospective student has their heart set on Malone, has passed all the GPA/testing requirements, and abides by the agreement that every other student abides by…why would they not go to Malone? Malone has a discriminatory policy that can change and evolve to include all minority/oppressed groups and we come to dialogue in regards to how this could best be achieved.
It is also possible that students entered Malone questioning or not fully understanding their sexual orientation. Or their parents push them to attend their alma mater, or do not allow room to choose any other institution. These are difficult positions to be in (especially if the parents are paying for tuition). Once a student has a loving faith community and is involved in student life it is very difficult to face the decision of walking away from it all or letting their parents know why they shouldn’t go to a school! Some of the schools we visit find out that a student has been dating, or is “outed” by a friend that heard a phone call (or similar) and the school forces them into “reparative therapy” and contacts the family or expels the student. Once the student finds themselves without their faith community, family, friends, and school…what happens to them? If you found yourself completely rejected by everyone and everything you ever loved, what would you do? Did you know that LGBTQ individuals are 3 to 7 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterpart? These are not made up statistics. Kids are killing themselves and being killed. We have had several Riders that have experienced this. Feel free to talk to them more in depth about their personal experiences.
Your final question asks how Soulforce responds to biblical passages that define marriage as the union of one man and one woman. This conversation, in my experience, has taken upwards of an hour and is most commonly a give and take because of the different interpretations of the Bible between denominations and person by person. In a nutshell, and not doing your question justice, I must ask you to look in the Bible and find where it condemns the union of two people of the same gender. It does not. Jesus didn’t say anything against it and the Bible doesn’t mention a healthy, committed, loving relationship between two people of the same gender. To talk about this more in depth, please come to any one of our community events. I can also send you online resources.
April 23rd 7pm – United Church of Christ Panel Discussion with the Equality Riders
April 24th 8pm – Community party/gathering Venue TBA
April 25th 9am - Bible Study focusing on Clobber Passages and Worship Service at 10:30am
You end saying, “what may be false to you is true to someone else and vice versa. Why is your truth more important than someone else’s? Does not equality embrace individual beliefs for all?” I don’t believe that there is one truth that is more important than another in this case and I do not want to draw a line between people. It is a misunderstanding on Malone’s part of what exactly equality means. It is completely possible to treat everyone as equal human beings with justice, love, and respect without compromising your (or their) faith. The Bible has at different points in history been used to justify the inequitable treatment of many different groups of people. As humanity has progressed it has understood that as Christians of faith we cannot continue allowing a certain group to be marginalized, oppressed, discriminated, and treated as less than because it is simply not Christ-like. This has not invalidated the Bible, and has only succeeded in strengthening the faith and message. It is the way in which progressives have renewed our understanding of the Bible time and time again that has brought the Word into the 21st century, with God’s will, of course.
I hope this has helped. Please e-mail me with more questions, but I hope to see you at any of the other community events.
Blessings,
Sabrina Diz
First I’d like to thank you for contacting me because I know that it takes a lot of courage and strength to speak your mind. No, I have not received many letters in opposition to our visit. None, actually. In my opinion, your comments and questions are directed in a Christ-like manner and this type of dialogue is what the Equality Ride is all about. Your letter poses some wonderful questions that get right to the heart of why we, 25 activists, leave our families and loved ones and go around the country for two months to visit colleges and universities. I hope to do your letter justice by answering below; however, it would be ideal if you can meet up with us any of the three days we will be in Canton, OH as I am sure the answers I give will open up more questions and comments!
Before I go on, I’d like to clear something up. While it is true that homophobia is successfully spread by religion and maintained by the church, not all the Riders feel oppressed by the Christian faith. Personally, I go to an affirming church and am happy to say I am Christian and queer :)
You inquire why we are visiting your campus, and especially since all types of public displays of affection are discouraged. My answer is simply that there are students on your campus that are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer and have not broken the covenant of celibacy, and might be perfectly happy to not engage in PDA. You see, our society has made “homosexuality” such a taboo that people find it very difficult to separate the Identity with the sexual act. If you don’t know any queer people, don’t learn or talk about it in school or at home, and all the information you receive about queer folks is linked to sex or sexual behavior, of course, that’s all you’re going to think about when the topic comes up. However, these students have a need to talk about their feelings, their experiences, their fears. Just as every other student on campus feels safe enough to ask questions, the Equality Ride is going to Malone in hopes that we can open up safe spaces for LGBTQ students to talk and ask questions too, without feeling like they are wrong for it, and feel safe about doing so. These questions range from what should I wear on my first date, to how do I tell my parents and faith community? What does the Bible say? What are these things I feel inside? I’m not attracted to the opposite gender, what does that mean? Students right now are suffering in an imposed silence.
Your second question, summed up, asks: People enter Malone fully aware of its rules, why would Soulforce choose to protest at a school where students have signed an agreement to participate to Malone’s standards? I have to admit, we get this all the time. There is a simple answer is that Malone is a fine institution with a rich and wonderful history and faith. Students that go to Malone have chosen to do so based on this and the programs offered there. It is not my understanding that the Quaker/Evangelical Friends have a tradition of excluding people, and so if a prospective student has their heart set on Malone, has passed all the GPA/testing requirements, and abides by the agreement that every other student abides by…why would they not go to Malone? Malone has a discriminatory policy that can change and evolve to include all minority/oppressed groups and we come to dialogue in regards to how this could best be achieved.
It is also possible that students entered Malone questioning or not fully understanding their sexual orientation. Or their parents push them to attend their alma mater, or do not allow room to choose any other institution. These are difficult positions to be in (especially if the parents are paying for tuition). Once a student has a loving faith community and is involved in student life it is very difficult to face the decision of walking away from it all or letting their parents know why they shouldn’t go to a school! Some of the schools we visit find out that a student has been dating, or is “outed” by a friend that heard a phone call (or similar) and the school forces them into “reparative therapy” and contacts the family or expels the student. Once the student finds themselves without their faith community, family, friends, and school…what happens to them? If you found yourself completely rejected by everyone and everything you ever loved, what would you do? Did you know that LGBTQ individuals are 3 to 7 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterpart? These are not made up statistics. Kids are killing themselves and being killed. We have had several Riders that have experienced this. Feel free to talk to them more in depth about their personal experiences.
Your final question asks how Soulforce responds to biblical passages that define marriage as the union of one man and one woman. This conversation, in my experience, has taken upwards of an hour and is most commonly a give and take because of the different interpretations of the Bible between denominations and person by person. In a nutshell, and not doing your question justice, I must ask you to look in the Bible and find where it condemns the union of two people of the same gender. It does not. Jesus didn’t say anything against it and the Bible doesn’t mention a healthy, committed, loving relationship between two people of the same gender. To talk about this more in depth, please come to any one of our community events. I can also send you online resources.
April 23rd 7pm – United Church of Christ Panel Discussion with the Equality Riders
April 24th 8pm – Community party/gathering Venue TBA
April 25th 9am - Bible Study focusing on Clobber Passages and Worship Service at 10:30am
You end saying, “what may be false to you is true to someone else and vice versa. Why is your truth more important than someone else’s? Does not equality embrace individual beliefs for all?” I don’t believe that there is one truth that is more important than another in this case and I do not want to draw a line between people. It is a misunderstanding on Malone’s part of what exactly equality means. It is completely possible to treat everyone as equal human beings with justice, love, and respect without compromising your (or their) faith. The Bible has at different points in history been used to justify the inequitable treatment of many different groups of people. As humanity has progressed it has understood that as Christians of faith we cannot continue allowing a certain group to be marginalized, oppressed, discriminated, and treated as less than because it is simply not Christ-like. This has not invalidated the Bible, and has only succeeded in strengthening the faith and message. It is the way in which progressives have renewed our understanding of the Bible time and time again that has brought the Word into the 21st century, with God’s will, of course.
I hope this has helped. Please e-mail me with more questions, but I hope to see you at any of the other community events.
Blessings,
Sabrina Diz
Friday, March 19, 2010
3/17 3/18 3/19 in North Carolina
My posts here are commentaries also posted on www.goqnotes.com an LGBTQ resource/news site:
March 17
Yesterday we got together and talked about SouthEastern Baptist Theological Seminary (SEBTS). The administration was reluctant to let us do much more than attend Chapel with students and staff. They added that they thought it was "ludicrous" for us to request time for open dialogue with students on campus and denied our requests to hold workshops or discussions. I'm not sure what is so crazy about an institution of higher learning allowing for students to have a safe space to talk and ask questions, especially when these students are going to graduate and one day find themselves in need of answers to questions on the intersection of justice, faith, and sexuality.
The Stop Planner, Kimmy DeVries, decided to accept their invitation to Chapel; after all, she believes that it came from a place of love. Chapel and service went smoothly. Aside from personally perceiving the Minister to be extremely sexist, it was a good sermon with an honest message. Ironically, the message was on "practice what you preach" and the gap between your faith and your character.
Essentially, the sermon is exactly what the Equality Ride is all about. Our goal is to allow the schools that we visit to re-examine the ways in which they act toward the LGBTQ community and the ways in which Christian values call us to actually behave. SEBTS has a policy that discriminates against queer students. The school holds a vague school policy that deams "homosexual behavior" as synonymous to sexual immorality and this, in our view, does nothing to promote safety for the queer community on campus. We believe that this is equal to spiritual violence and can easily be understood to justify other kinds of violence.
So after Chapel we spoke to students that came up to us for about twenty minutes. I had great conversation with three female students. The conversation switched back and forth between the Bible, ethics, and morality. It was deep and yet lighthearted. Moments in time that feel like you're talking to old friends. As I looked around I noticed that I was not the only one. There were dozens of students interested in chatting with us! Unfortunately, security sternly asked that we leave. Afraid of getting arrested, we had to go.
We drove on the big, queer bus to a corner right outside of school grounds and vigiled. The songs attracted some students, including one of the girls who I was speaking to earlier! We continued talking, and even though we debated on some fundamental beliefs of scripture (most notably that I don't believe being queer is a sin) we absolute agreed that justice is a cornerstone of Christianity.
Soon after we moved on to a public park where even more students showed up to continue dialogue. It was a beautiful sunny day and perfect for making friends. Some students and Riders were engaged in heady discussion and debate, however, it was never angry or violent. I truly believe that Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary could have easily provided a space for all this to occur, and it is a shame that they blew a chance at providing all their students an opportunity to practice what they preach.
March 18
As Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary and Campbell University are relatively close to each other, this year the Equality Ride decided that we could reach out to students of both campuses during a three day stop. Normally it is emotionally as well as mentally draining to visit a campus. Not that I’m complaining, this is what drives me, but justifying our views, beliefs, and identities day after day is not an easy task. As the bus drove into the parking lot this morning we were all exhausted from yesterday and yet still very excited since Campbell invited us on and agreed to host us for most of the day. After SEBTS’ experience yesterday I believe I can speak for everyone when I say we hoped for a warmer welcome.
It was extremely disappointing to see that the schedule for the day was so tightly controlled. Again, there was very little time allowed for student/Rider interaction. After a presentation by our Riders in the auditorium that went pleasantly well, instead of continuing with the lively discussion, the President of the school talked about Campbell history for over an hour. It was a deliberate tactic on their part in order to deter and derail conversation. Afterward we were ushered out to a campus tour and then to a closed area for lunch that was “by invitation only”. During lunch the speaker talked about football and school legends for at least a half hour, after cutting off dialogue between the Riders and students that had begun organically. Even though the moderator did his best to frustrate our efforts the students were genuinely interested in engaging us. One gay and out student in particular has worked ceaselessly to have a Gay/Straight Alliance (GSA) approved on campus and boldly spoke out, telling the moderator that he was sorely disappointed at the school’s stance and their inability to take action. It was a shining moment. While the 25 of us have many wonderful points to make, ideas to share, and are eager to engage in conversation Alexey Bulokhob (2006 Rider) said it best when he said: “The Equality Ride bus is like a giant mirror. Each school that we visit gets to view themselves in it and how their campus reflects Christian love.” Because of this we always prefer when we can sit back in amazement as students stand up for what is right and just in the face of administrators and faculty that have forgotten what those values look like.
Some of us were talking afterwards and agreed that whatever the welcome we receive it will be properly judged only after we are gone, once we can evaluate the welcome queer students on campus continue to experience. After leaving campus we got together close by with queer students and talked together about their experiences at Campbell, their frustrations, and their need for a safe space to talk and continue to share. I felt saddened that I did not have the opportunity to connect and share with more students today. It felt awful to be so controlled and manipulated, treated so much less than I am used to by my own Christian brethren! The boldfaced lies by faculty and deliberate minimal student interaction was discouraging, but we find hope in the courage of the students who are working diligently to create a safe space on Campbell University and we are committed to working with them until this goal is achieved.
In love, justice, and solidarity…
Sabrina
March 19 - Chapel Hill
The Equality Ride visited UNC Chapel Hill today. We met up at the LGBTQ Resource Center on campus, met with supporters, and also showed a screening of "Equality U", a documentary of the first Equality Ride in 2006. It is our hope that if students and community members are aware of our efforts since they are right around the corner from the schools we visited, Southeastern Baptist Theoogical Seminary and Campbell University, they would be willing to help. Indeed, many UNC students signed up to be a part of the winds of change that are blowing through these other school!
As I sat with my fellow Riders at the resource center playing games and chatting with UNC students it struck me that I felt safe. I felt sure and at ease and safe. My fellow Riders and the students from UNC all chatted and spoke out loud words like "queer" and "gender" and "lesbian" without worrying about a backlash or consequences or losing their community. It was the first time that I was on a school campus and felt almost at home and it really struck me that this was how all students could feel everywhere, without toppling the faith or moral structure of the school. These thoughts sat heavy on my chest because I know that it will be a long time before the sense of safety UNC students felt is experienced by students everywhere.
Tomorrow we travel to Daytona, Fl to attempt to enter an entire community where homophobia persists. As someone who is originally from Miami, it never occurrred to me that Daytona would be an unwelcoming town. However, it has been very difficult to have people even respond to our letters! So our big, queer bus is on its way out of the Bible Belt for a little bit, but not yet out of the woods!
Follow us at: Soulforce.org or write to me at Sabrina_Diz@equalityride.com
March 17
Yesterday we got together and talked about SouthEastern Baptist Theological Seminary (SEBTS). The administration was reluctant to let us do much more than attend Chapel with students and staff. They added that they thought it was "ludicrous" for us to request time for open dialogue with students on campus and denied our requests to hold workshops or discussions. I'm not sure what is so crazy about an institution of higher learning allowing for students to have a safe space to talk and ask questions, especially when these students are going to graduate and one day find themselves in need of answers to questions on the intersection of justice, faith, and sexuality.
The Stop Planner, Kimmy DeVries, decided to accept their invitation to Chapel; after all, she believes that it came from a place of love. Chapel and service went smoothly. Aside from personally perceiving the Minister to be extremely sexist, it was a good sermon with an honest message. Ironically, the message was on "practice what you preach" and the gap between your faith and your character.
Essentially, the sermon is exactly what the Equality Ride is all about. Our goal is to allow the schools that we visit to re-examine the ways in which they act toward the LGBTQ community and the ways in which Christian values call us to actually behave. SEBTS has a policy that discriminates against queer students. The school holds a vague school policy that deams "homosexual behavior" as synonymous to sexual immorality and this, in our view, does nothing to promote safety for the queer community on campus. We believe that this is equal to spiritual violence and can easily be understood to justify other kinds of violence.
So after Chapel we spoke to students that came up to us for about twenty minutes. I had great conversation with three female students. The conversation switched back and forth between the Bible, ethics, and morality. It was deep and yet lighthearted. Moments in time that feel like you're talking to old friends. As I looked around I noticed that I was not the only one. There were dozens of students interested in chatting with us! Unfortunately, security sternly asked that we leave. Afraid of getting arrested, we had to go.
We drove on the big, queer bus to a corner right outside of school grounds and vigiled. The songs attracted some students, including one of the girls who I was speaking to earlier! We continued talking, and even though we debated on some fundamental beliefs of scripture (most notably that I don't believe being queer is a sin) we absolute agreed that justice is a cornerstone of Christianity.
Soon after we moved on to a public park where even more students showed up to continue dialogue. It was a beautiful sunny day and perfect for making friends. Some students and Riders were engaged in heady discussion and debate, however, it was never angry or violent. I truly believe that Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary could have easily provided a space for all this to occur, and it is a shame that they blew a chance at providing all their students an opportunity to practice what they preach.
March 18
As Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary and Campbell University are relatively close to each other, this year the Equality Ride decided that we could reach out to students of both campuses during a three day stop. Normally it is emotionally as well as mentally draining to visit a campus. Not that I’m complaining, this is what drives me, but justifying our views, beliefs, and identities day after day is not an easy task. As the bus drove into the parking lot this morning we were all exhausted from yesterday and yet still very excited since Campbell invited us on and agreed to host us for most of the day. After SEBTS’ experience yesterday I believe I can speak for everyone when I say we hoped for a warmer welcome.
It was extremely disappointing to see that the schedule for the day was so tightly controlled. Again, there was very little time allowed for student/Rider interaction. After a presentation by our Riders in the auditorium that went pleasantly well, instead of continuing with the lively discussion, the President of the school talked about Campbell history for over an hour. It was a deliberate tactic on their part in order to deter and derail conversation. Afterward we were ushered out to a campus tour and then to a closed area for lunch that was “by invitation only”. During lunch the speaker talked about football and school legends for at least a half hour, after cutting off dialogue between the Riders and students that had begun organically. Even though the moderator did his best to frustrate our efforts the students were genuinely interested in engaging us. One gay and out student in particular has worked ceaselessly to have a Gay/Straight Alliance (GSA) approved on campus and boldly spoke out, telling the moderator that he was sorely disappointed at the school’s stance and their inability to take action. It was a shining moment. While the 25 of us have many wonderful points to make, ideas to share, and are eager to engage in conversation Alexey Bulokhob (2006 Rider) said it best when he said: “The Equality Ride bus is like a giant mirror. Each school that we visit gets to view themselves in it and how their campus reflects Christian love.” Because of this we always prefer when we can sit back in amazement as students stand up for what is right and just in the face of administrators and faculty that have forgotten what those values look like.
Some of us were talking afterwards and agreed that whatever the welcome we receive it will be properly judged only after we are gone, once we can evaluate the welcome queer students on campus continue to experience. After leaving campus we got together close by with queer students and talked together about their experiences at Campbell, their frustrations, and their need for a safe space to talk and continue to share. I felt saddened that I did not have the opportunity to connect and share with more students today. It felt awful to be so controlled and manipulated, treated so much less than I am used to by my own Christian brethren! The boldfaced lies by faculty and deliberate minimal student interaction was discouraging, but we find hope in the courage of the students who are working diligently to create a safe space on Campbell University and we are committed to working with them until this goal is achieved.
In love, justice, and solidarity…
Sabrina
March 19 - Chapel Hill
The Equality Ride visited UNC Chapel Hill today. We met up at the LGBTQ Resource Center on campus, met with supporters, and also showed a screening of "Equality U", a documentary of the first Equality Ride in 2006. It is our hope that if students and community members are aware of our efforts since they are right around the corner from the schools we visited, Southeastern Baptist Theoogical Seminary and Campbell University, they would be willing to help. Indeed, many UNC students signed up to be a part of the winds of change that are blowing through these other school!
As I sat with my fellow Riders at the resource center playing games and chatting with UNC students it struck me that I felt safe. I felt sure and at ease and safe. My fellow Riders and the students from UNC all chatted and spoke out loud words like "queer" and "gender" and "lesbian" without worrying about a backlash or consequences or losing their community. It was the first time that I was on a school campus and felt almost at home and it really struck me that this was how all students could feel everywhere, without toppling the faith or moral structure of the school. These thoughts sat heavy on my chest because I know that it will be a long time before the sense of safety UNC students felt is experienced by students everywhere.
Tomorrow we travel to Daytona, Fl to attempt to enter an entire community where homophobia persists. As someone who is originally from Miami, it never occurrred to me that Daytona would be an unwelcoming town. However, it has been very difficult to have people even respond to our letters! So our big, queer bus is on its way out of the Bible Belt for a little bit, but not yet out of the woods!
Follow us at: Soulforce.org or write to me at Sabrina_Diz@equalityride.com
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Letter to a Friend
My dear and sorely missed friend....
I've been hoping to get a chance to talk to you for days now. It saddens me that I left you at a time when you might just need a friend most of all. I hope that this is mostly my guilty conscience, and that you're doing just fine. It's hard to go do what I'm passionate about, and leave behind the people that ignited the flame.
Alabama was amazing. It is truly my favorite Stop so far. It went smoothly; well, smoother than we all thought it would go. The trouble was that Oakwood University sent an e-mail to all their students that not only let their students know we were coming, but told them that if they felt 'unsafe' to call Campus Police and also that we were 'trained very well and any form of debate would be fruitless and unsuccessful'. It really sounded as if they painted us as a militant group looking to cause trouble. You know me...I can hear you laughing at this. Can you picture me as militant? Maybe loud and obnoxioux, but roudy and violent? Well, it scared us because the last thing we wanted was students thinking we were out to push any sort of agenda at all costs.
Anyway, our Bus was led to a building so far off campus, in such a roundabout way, that no student saw us. According to a "source" we were led to the Health building that is only technically on campus. We were ushered into a room with photographers and video cameras and although we were treated respectfully (and by this I mean people shook our hands and introduced themselves and we were offered seating) there were about 6 to 10 students and the rest of the 50 people were administrators and faculty. The seating was in rows with an aisle down the middle, and at the front was a pulpit; decked out with a bold cross. It was set up for service, yet the paper that was handed out stated "Dialogue" albeit in quotation marks. It was almost painful to see my fellow Riders so nervous, because I love and care each one and know that how they were perceived, and indeed understood, was so far from who they are.
It was slow to begin, but as uncomfortable as it was to talk to each other a nice flow of conversation ensued. No thanks to administration, that in my opinion made it as uneasy as possible, but to the students that were genuinely interested in learning our purpose. To those brave souls (they were indeed as brave as us) my wholehearted thanks. They reminded us why we travel around leaving jobs, friends, loved ones, and those comforts like a cold drink or passing by your mailbox and experiencing the feeling of "belonging" as you carry bills and letters into your home. We redirected attempts to reduce our whole identities to a sex act eloquently and Oakwood students brought the conversation back to common ground and shared Christian values beautifully. After an hour that quenched no one's thirst, they ushered us into lunch. There we were able to continue "dialogue" with students as cameras inches from our faces worked furiously to annoy, distract, and intimidate. We were not allowed any type of releases on this material, as our acceptance to speak to students on campus "annulled our right to refuse to be photographed". We have also not been told how this material will be used. And, of course, we were not allowed to photograph or videotape. If I wasn't as resolute in my love for God, this display would have shaken my faith. Most of the people there were Theology professors, ministers and preachers; the students were all Theology majors (as fitting of the criteria "the list of invited Oakwood staff and students" had to fulfill to attend). And yet as the strangers, the foreigners, the marginalized, and the oppressed we were treated with disrespect and injustice. Even as I write this, I feel pressured to erase the words and be grateful for what we were given as I am sure Oakwood would like us to be. But I'm outraged that I should be happy with crumbs as they ate so fully in front of me.
If the school would have given us a proper welcome, let us speak to those students that really needed to speak with us. If the administrators would have treated as full human beings and allowed us the intellectual dialogue and not stood between the possible relationships that as Equality Riders we strive for, than we would not have felt the need to rally outside campus. Our intent was to hold a vigil; however, students began arriving almost immediately and they wanted to talk! Imagine that! Adult college educated people interested in learning about others. It was an interesting stop for me. Our last few stops had been primarily White schools and communities in which I felt as if on the perimeter of all conversation and social interaction. It actually wasn't very noticeable until I started speaking with Oakwood, a Historically Black Institution (HBI). Once I did, I felt more comfortable. And that's all I can say about that, only because some things have no words.
Students followed us to Chilli's and even to our hotel lobby afterwards to continue conversations and talk about their own experiences. It was quite noticeable that students were outraged at how we were treated, the policy against LGBTQ students, and many policies that was oppressive for all students. Even though I came away with a feeling of fear, fear that once we left students would feel like there were too many problems for students to fix, the connections we made with LGBTQ students on campus lead me to believe that in the very least, we spread hope and affirmation. And that's pretty okay with me, too.
So that was our last campus visit. The day before, we went out to a gay bar and met up with the community and had a lot of fun. We watched a Drag King show and laughed and danced and acted like fools :) It was so very much needed!!!! It was awesome... Let me tell you, there are some BEAUTIFUL people in Alabama!
How are you, my dear friend? I don't want my stories to overwhelm the conversation. Please tell me how you are doing, I worry!
With much love, and many blessings...
Sabrina Diz
It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home. ~Carl T. Rowan
I've been hoping to get a chance to talk to you for days now. It saddens me that I left you at a time when you might just need a friend most of all. I hope that this is mostly my guilty conscience, and that you're doing just fine. It's hard to go do what I'm passionate about, and leave behind the people that ignited the flame.
Alabama was amazing. It is truly my favorite Stop so far. It went smoothly; well, smoother than we all thought it would go. The trouble was that Oakwood University sent an e-mail to all their students that not only let their students know we were coming, but told them that if they felt 'unsafe' to call Campus Police and also that we were 'trained very well and any form of debate would be fruitless and unsuccessful'. It really sounded as if they painted us as a militant group looking to cause trouble. You know me...I can hear you laughing at this. Can you picture me as militant? Maybe loud and obnoxioux, but roudy and violent? Well, it scared us because the last thing we wanted was students thinking we were out to push any sort of agenda at all costs.
Anyway, our Bus was led to a building so far off campus, in such a roundabout way, that no student saw us. According to a "source" we were led to the Health building that is only technically on campus. We were ushered into a room with photographers and video cameras and although we were treated respectfully (and by this I mean people shook our hands and introduced themselves and we were offered seating) there were about 6 to 10 students and the rest of the 50 people were administrators and faculty. The seating was in rows with an aisle down the middle, and at the front was a pulpit; decked out with a bold cross. It was set up for service, yet the paper that was handed out stated "Dialogue" albeit in quotation marks. It was almost painful to see my fellow Riders so nervous, because I love and care each one and know that how they were perceived, and indeed understood, was so far from who they are.
It was slow to begin, but as uncomfortable as it was to talk to each other a nice flow of conversation ensued. No thanks to administration, that in my opinion made it as uneasy as possible, but to the students that were genuinely interested in learning our purpose. To those brave souls (they were indeed as brave as us) my wholehearted thanks. They reminded us why we travel around leaving jobs, friends, loved ones, and those comforts like a cold drink or passing by your mailbox and experiencing the feeling of "belonging" as you carry bills and letters into your home. We redirected attempts to reduce our whole identities to a sex act eloquently and Oakwood students brought the conversation back to common ground and shared Christian values beautifully. After an hour that quenched no one's thirst, they ushered us into lunch. There we were able to continue "dialogue" with students as cameras inches from our faces worked furiously to annoy, distract, and intimidate. We were not allowed any type of releases on this material, as our acceptance to speak to students on campus "annulled our right to refuse to be photographed". We have also not been told how this material will be used. And, of course, we were not allowed to photograph or videotape. If I wasn't as resolute in my love for God, this display would have shaken my faith. Most of the people there were Theology professors, ministers and preachers; the students were all Theology majors (as fitting of the criteria "the list of invited Oakwood staff and students" had to fulfill to attend). And yet as the strangers, the foreigners, the marginalized, and the oppressed we were treated with disrespect and injustice. Even as I write this, I feel pressured to erase the words and be grateful for what we were given as I am sure Oakwood would like us to be. But I'm outraged that I should be happy with crumbs as they ate so fully in front of me.
If the school would have given us a proper welcome, let us speak to those students that really needed to speak with us. If the administrators would have treated as full human beings and allowed us the intellectual dialogue and not stood between the possible relationships that as Equality Riders we strive for, than we would not have felt the need to rally outside campus. Our intent was to hold a vigil; however, students began arriving almost immediately and they wanted to talk! Imagine that! Adult college educated people interested in learning about others. It was an interesting stop for me. Our last few stops had been primarily White schools and communities in which I felt as if on the perimeter of all conversation and social interaction. It actually wasn't very noticeable until I started speaking with Oakwood, a Historically Black Institution (HBI). Once I did, I felt more comfortable. And that's all I can say about that, only because some things have no words.
Students followed us to Chilli's and even to our hotel lobby afterwards to continue conversations and talk about their own experiences. It was quite noticeable that students were outraged at how we were treated, the policy against LGBTQ students, and many policies that was oppressive for all students. Even though I came away with a feeling of fear, fear that once we left students would feel like there were too many problems for students to fix, the connections we made with LGBTQ students on campus lead me to believe that in the very least, we spread hope and affirmation. And that's pretty okay with me, too.
So that was our last campus visit. The day before, we went out to a gay bar and met up with the community and had a lot of fun. We watched a Drag King show and laughed and danced and acted like fools :) It was so very much needed!!!! It was awesome... Let me tell you, there are some BEAUTIFUL people in Alabama!
How are you, my dear friend? I don't want my stories to overwhelm the conversation. Please tell me how you are doing, I worry!
With much love, and many blessings...
Sabrina Diz
It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home. ~Carl T. Rowan
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
